If You’re Not Texting Me Back, I’m Moving On

I thought this time would be different, but you’ve turned out to be like the rest of the losers I’ve dealt with. I know exactly what you’re doing — ignoring my texts to prove you have the upper hand. Sure, you’ll come around when you feel like it — but just so you know, if you’re not texting me back, I’m moving on.

  1. I’ve been through this before. It’s amazing to think some of the loudest songs are completely silent. I’m no stranger to being left hanging this way, so you’re not doing anything amazing by withholding the set of balls you clearly don’t have.
  2. You’re not worth the data. I could text you and ask you why. I could fill your inbox with every hateful thing I want to say to you, but I won’t. It’s clear you weren’t good enough for me anyway, and the right person for me will communicate like a grown up instead of disappearing into thin air.
  3. I don’t date cowards. I should really be thanking you for showing me your lack of courage, not to mention terrible human communication abilities. Ignoring me doesn’t make your life easier; it makes you an idiot who isn’t learning anything. You can run from the truth all you want, but it will eventually catch up with you somewhere along the way. It won’t be with me, and for that I’m grateful.
  4. When you finally hit me with your excuse, I’ll have found my own reasons. If you see me in passing and attempt to play cool, or you think you might slip into my inbox someday down the road, think again. I don’t even care to know why, because while you were away, I spent the time figuring out that you’re seriously not worth it.
  5. This ending is a dime a dozen these days. Being like everyone else isn’t anything you should be proud of. I know you think not texting me as a means of ending things is trendy, but a real man aims to stand out from the crowd. Thank you for showing me which category you fall into.
  6. You’ve only shown me that I deserve better than you. Even if your ending is completely disrespectful, I can’t help but look at the silver lining. As great as I might have thought you once were, I know now that what’s meant for me is infinitely better than you, so I’ll move forward and leave myself open for someone who is worth investing my amazing self into.
  7. Trust me — I’m not holding on to hope. If you think that I’m pining away waiting for my phone to buzz, you’re wrong. I gave up on you as quickly as you hit the ignore button. A ghost is someone who’s dead to me, and I won’t try to revive what you’ve killed because there’s really no point.
  8. You didn’t win, because I don’t want you anymore. You might think you were the one to end things, but the truth is, I made my decision in your absence. You’re not the one I want or need in my life. And because you never uttered a single word as to why, this break up is mine to claim. Just so we’re clear, it’s me who doesn’t want you.
  9. Adios. I might have been initially annoyed by your cowardly exit, but the truth is in making this cliche departure, you’ve only enabled my ability to completely forget you and any fondness I may have felt. You didn’t text me, so I’m moving on. Farewell, goodbye, and good riddance.