You’re Probably Guilty Of Phubbing—Admit It

If you have a smartphone then you’re probably guilty of phubbing. It’s when you’re so absorbed in your phone that you start neglecting the person you’re with and it’s seriously ruining relationships. Here are 11 signs that you definitely need to take a break from your phone and concentrate on your partner instead.

  1. You always have your phone on the table. It doesn’t matter where you are—you insist on having your phone visible to you at all times. Even when you’re on a date, you have your phone there just in case the conversation becomes dull and you need an excuse to check social media. It might not seem like a big deal but this behavior is rude AF.
  2. You constantly glance at your phone during conversations. Even if you have your phone on a table face-down, it’s still disruptive because you’ll be thinking about what you could be doing on it if you weren’t being “distracted” by conversation. You could be looking on social media, checking your messages, or anything that involves not paying attention to the person in front of you.
  3. You lose track of time when you’re using your phone. Your phone vibrates and you see that you have an email that you urgently need to reply to, which then leads to you looking on social media, reading several articles and Googling random questions about life. Meanwhile, your partner is sitting there waiting for you to give them some attention. You really need to disconnect for awhile.
  4. You choose to scroll through your phone over talking to your partner. Sure, you can justify being on your phone if you’re waiting for an important text or email, but if you’re looking on social media while your boyfriend is trying to have a conversation with you, you need to rethink what you’re doing. According to a study, Phubbing could be to blame for the problems in your relationship. When a conversation is interrupted by using your phone, it’s basically giving off the message that whatever is on the screen is more important and that can make your partner feel neglected.
  5. You feel lost without your phone in your hand. You have withdrawal symptoms if your phone isn’t within reach and you can get an itch to check if you have any new notifications every five minutes. If you constantly have a desire to be on your phone, try to find a distraction. Ask your partner about their day, find a new hobby, do some yoga—whatever stops you from wasting countless hours staring at a screen. Even taking a short break from using your phone can help your relationship.
  6. You don’t always hear what your boyfriend’s telling you. Sometimes, you’re so absorbed in reading your messages on your phone that you’re not paying attention to the person next to you. When he doesn’t get a reply from you, he thinks that you don’t care even though that’s probably not the case. If you took your eyes off the screen for a second, you’d see that.
  7. You use your phone whenever your partner does. Maybe you’re not the only who’s guilty of pubbing—your boyfriend could be equally as addicted to using his phone. Still, that doesn’t mean that whenever he does it you should do it too. Instead of making it a competition of who can ignore each other for the longest, you should ban phones whenever you’re on a date. You’ll probably find that your relationship improves.
  8. You feel the need to take pictures all the time. Whenever you’re out, you have your phone in your hand, ready to take photos for your Instagram. Instead of appreciating the person you’re with, you’re too distracted taking pictures of your food. It makes you look disinterested and bored.
  9. You check your phone after an argument with your boyfriend. Using your phone might seem like a good way to fill the silence but it’s actually creating a barrier between you. It’s equivalent to walking away during an argument—it solves nothing!
  10. Your partner can see it. So how do you know you’re definitely guilty of phubbing? Your boyfriend tells you that you are. He spends a lot of time with you so he knows how often you use your phone. If he thinks that it’s causing problems, put the phone down and talk to him. You can’t have that conversation through a screen—it has to be face-to-face.
  11. You feel like you’re missing out. It speaks volumes if your phone habits are making you feel like you’re missing out on life. To be blunt, you’re wasting so much time. You could be spending that time having face-to-face conversations with your partner. Isn’t that better than being glued to a screen? Put your phone away and start working on your relationship!
Coralle is a freelance writer and blogger with a special interest in Mental Health & wellness, Women's health, and relationships.

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