When You’re A Strong, Independent Woman, Should You Date Someone Stronger Or Weaker Than You?

You’re driven, outspoken, self-sufficient and an all-around badass, and not just any guy will be able to keep up with you. You think you know what you want in a guy, but what kind of guy do you need? For strong, independent women looking for a partner, which one is the best match: a weaker guy, or a stronger guy? Easy – neither. What you need is someone equally strong and independent as you. Here’s why:

  1. Strong men don’t feel the need to compete with you. You’ll know a strong man when you meet one because instead of trying to compete with you, he admires and respects how hard you’ve worked to get where you are. He’ll never make you feel like you aren’t enough for him and he’ll never be intimidated by you. He’ll celebrate all of your accomplishments and support you through the rough times while constantly reminding you just how amazing you are.
  2. Weak men are everywhere; strong men are rare. There’s a reason you keep going on first dates with weak losers – because they’re everywhere and they’re perpetually single! The strong ones are harder to find, but make no mistake, they’re out there. Be patient and don’t settle – you’re worth the very best.
  3. An equally strong partner will make you stronger. Their strength will inspire you to keep striving for the life you want to live and to become the best version of yourself. Strong men are flexible in how to offer their support because they got their strength from surviving awful circumstances and never losing their desire to be happy.
  4. A weak partner will hold you back. Weakness is a lot like misery in that it loovvvveessss company. A weak man will be smiling on the inside when he sees you fail because he secretly wants you to feel helpless without him. He’ll then want to take credit for your success rather than celebrating your hard work. Screw that.
  5. Your match will know how to balance you out. We’re all allowed to feel all over the place mentally and emotionally from time to time – we’re human beings, after all. So when you find yourself in a puddle of sadness, a ball of stress or even a blur of excitement, a strong partner will meet you in that feeling and will even out your emotions (and you’ll be glad to do the same in return).
  6. Weak men are the jealous kind. A weaker man will be intimidated by your confidence and will misread it as flirting, showing off, blah blah blah. It’s obviously a heap of incorrect BS, but weak men know they don’t deserve you and that any attractive quality you have will be recognized by men who are worthy – and that fear will make them jealous jerks.
  7. Strong men want the real thing. Weak men are often players. They can’t handle anything real, so they mess around and bail before you notice how much substance they lack. Strong men, however, are looking for a best friend and a partner to share their life with. That’s the one you want to hold out for.
  8. Weak men are terrible at sex. Should you choose a weaker man to spend your time with, be prepared to be utterly bored and unsatisfied in the bedroom. Weak men only focus on their own needs. They might do the bare minimum for you, but is the bare minimum ever really enough? Nah. You need to be satisfied in the bedroom as well as outside it, especially when you’re settling down with a guy for the long haul.
  9. Strong men make your pleasure a priority. A strong man will be happy to know that you are enjoying sex just as much as they are, and that means they do whatever they can to make sure you orgasm every time you sleep together. They won’t be satisfied until they know you are, and that says a lot.
  10. Weak men deserve to be alone. They can’t handle dating amazing women, so they might as well not even bother. If only they’d do the world a favor and be honest about who they are. You’d save so much time and energy if you knew to avoid them before even bothering to say hello.
  11. A strong man is looking for you right now. You’re a strong man’s dream woman. He wants to be half of a power couple and you’re the missing piece. Just as you are looking for him, he’s looking for you, so don’t give up. He won’t either.
is a freelance writer for Bustle and Petcha, and editor for Wise Bread. She suffers from separation anxiety, and can't bear to be away from her dog for more than 20 minutes. Her dog doesn't seem to care either way. Sweater season is her favorite season.