If You’ve Found The Love Of Your Life, Please Answer These Questions For Me

I have yet to find true love. I’m out there looking though and frankly, I’ll take all the help I can get. So if you’re one of the lucky couples that have actually found true love, I have a few questions for you:

  1. How long did it take for you to commit to each other? I feel like in modern dating, most guys have a fear of commitment. I often wonder if that fear is just a sign that we’re not right for each other. When I meet “The One,” I’d like to think that there’d be no hesitance to commit and make things official, but is that true?
  2. How do you keep your love alive? So often, love fades after time and the things couples once loved about each other, they grow to hate. Their lovable little quirks become flawed annoyances, so how do you keep that from happening? How do you continue to love each other day after day? I guess what I really want to know is, when the honeymoon stage is over, how does the love remain?
  3. Where do the good guys hang out? I go out to bars, clubs, restaurants, coffee shops and everywhere in between. I’m not hiding in my house, but it seems like no matter where I go, the only guys I meet are players. How did you meet? Where are all the good men hiding and finally, how do I find one?
  4. Do you believe in “The One”? This is true love we’re talking about here. Do you think you could ever find that love with someone else? Do you believe there’s one person for everyone? Could you be just as happy with someone else, or do you truly believe you could only feel this way with each other?
  5. How did you know this love was different? If you’ve been in love before, what was different about this person and this relationship? Maybe you really did love the people you were with before, but true love has to have its differences from puppy love or general love. So what makes it different? And really how do you know that this love is true love and that this love won’t fade?
  6. How long did it take you to figure out that this was true love? You started off just like any other relationship. You slowly got to know each other, became a couple and fell in love. So many love stories start off that way, but they don’t end happily ever after. So how long did it take you to figure out that this was real love and not just another temporary relationship?
  7. What keeps you together after all this time? It has to be more than love. Plenty of people love each other but can’t make things work. How do you continue to commit to each other and love each other every single day? Your relationship isn’t perfect. You have your fights and disagreements just like any other couple, no doubt, so what keeps you from calling it quits? What is it that makes you want to be together no matter what?
  8. What are the most important aspects of your relationship? Is it trust? Open communication? Love? Sexual compatibility? What’s the most important and what’s the least important? What things does every long lasting couple have in common? You built a good relationship, but what’s the foundation? What keeps that relationship from falling down?
  9. Have you changed over the course of your relationship? Are you the same people that first fell in love with each other or have you grown into different people and learned to love each other’s growth? How do you deal with those changes in each other and in yourself? I’m a different person than I was 10 years ago. Hell, I’m a different person that I was yesterday, so how do you cope with that?
  10. What’s the most important thing to look for in a mate? Do you need to agree on everything? Should you both want the same lifestyle? Do you simply need to be compatible? Do opposites really attract? What are the most important things for single women to look for when they’re trying to find true love?
  11. Have you ever had your heart broken? Did you find each other right away or did you go through so many years of the torturous dating game before you finally found each other? Have you experienced earth-shattering heartbreak? And if so, what kept you from giving up on finding love? How did you stay in the game, and after all is said and done, was finding each other worth all the previous pain?
Kelsey Dykstra is a freelance writer based in Huntington Beach, CA. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing from Grand Valley State University and been writing professionally since graduating in 2013. In addition to writing about love and relationships for Bolde and lifestyle topics for Love to Know, she also writes about payment security and small business solutions for PaymentCloud.

Originally from Michigan, this warm weather seeker relocated to the OC just last summer. Kelsey enjoys writing her own fictional pieces, reading a variety of young adult novels, binging on Netflix, and of course soaking up the sun.

You can find more about Kelsey on her LinkedIn profile or on Twitter @dykstrakelsey.