10 Annoying Questions Your Family Will Probably Ask You On Thanksgiving & How To Answer Them

Thanksgiving should be a holiday spent bonding with family, eating delicious food, and loafing on the couch watching football, but all too often it can start to feel like an interrogation. Instead of letting annoying, not-so-subtly hurtful questions get to you, be ready to answer them and have a drama and panic-attack free Thanksgiving.

  1. “Why didn’t you bring your boyfriend?” This question can be upsetting whether you’re single or dating someone. It’s invasive and can cause you to panic about the strength of your relationship, even if you felt secure in it before. How To Answer: “Spending the holiday with his family because we both wanted to celebrate with ours!” (Try to remain cheerful, even if you feel a little aggravated.)
  2. “Are you still single?” For some reason, relatives love to comment on your relationship status, even though it’s not really their business anyway. It can come off as judgmental, but try to remember that they might just be trying to make casual conversation with you. How To Answer: “Yep! I have high standards for a boyfriend and won’t settle.”
  3. “Putting on a few pounds to keep warm this winter, are we?” AKA a “nicer” way of saying that you look like you’ve gained weight. Whether it’s true or not, this is obviously hurtful and just unnecessary. Try to hide how angry you feel and act like weight is the last thing on your mind (whether it’s true or not). How To Answer: “I don’t know if I’ve gained any weight or not—my friends, family and work are my first priority, not a number on the scale!”
  4. “You look so skinny—are you eating!?” On the opposite end of the spectrum, questions about losing weight can be just as uncomfortable. No one wants to think about weight at Thanksgiving dinner (and you shouldn’t be, either!) How To Answer: “Really?! I’m not losing weight on purpose or anything, but thanks for caring enough to ask.”
  5. “Did you purposely dye your hair that color?” Especially if your hair is an unconventional color or significantly different than it had been the last time they saw you. This is a good question to answer with a little bit of humor. How To Answer: “No, I guess I need a new hairdresser, right?!”
  6. “Are you sure you really want that fourth glass of wine already?” Some family members absolutely love to get involved with personal choices. Whether you’re a little buzzed or not, drinking another glass of wine is your decision (assuming you’re not driving anywhere soon, of course). How To Answer: “Well, it’s a holiday! Plus all the food we’re about to eat at dinner will soak it right up.”
  7. “So, what do you plan to do with your degree when you graduate, anyway?” I hear this question all the time, and even if whoever’s asking is generally just curious, it can come off extremely judgmental. Whether you have an idea of what you want to do with your degree or not, comments like these can make you feel inadequate. How To Answer: “Right now I’m just focusing on graduating, but I do have a few ideas in the works.”
  8. “What’s your five-year plan?” Whenever anyone asks me a question like this, I almost laugh because I usually don’t even have the next five minutes planned. You might know what you’d like to accomplish in the next five years, or you might not, and either way that’s perfectly fine. If you don’t have a five-year plan mapped out to answer their question with (or you prefer not to go into detail about it at the moment), keep your response light and positive. How To Answer: “I can’t tell you, it’ll ruin the surprise!”
  9. “Why aren’t you eating the pie I made?” No matter if you’re just full or not in the mood for pie, people can sometimes get offended when you politely decline food they’ve made and offered to you. How To Answer: “I’m still so full from all of the turkey, but I’m definitely going to have some later on. It looks delicious.”
  10. “Why don’t you call us or visit more often?” Especially when it comes to older relatives, they don’t understand how busy our schedules often get. They think that forgetting to call or being unable to take a weekend trip to visit is something rude done purposely when in reality there’s just so much constantly going on throughout the day that it’s hard to get laundry done and dinner cooked sometimes. Of course, they probably are asking this because they miss you, but it can make you feel uncomfortable, especially if it’s asked in front of other family members. How To Answer: “I always think about you, I just have a crazy busy schedule right now. As soon as I have a little downtime, I’ll make sure to call more or plan a trip to visit. I’m glad we get to spend time together now today though!”
Kerry is a freelance writer from Boston, Massachusetts who now lives in the Sunshine State with the love of her life and her 15 month old daughter. She writes frequently about her personal experiences (find more of her work on www.followmetogetlost.wordpress.com). She has an Etsy shop with cute items: https://www.etsy.com/shop/FollowMeToGetLostWhen she's not writing, she loves to spend time outside, at the beach, and with her family.