10 Reasons Women With Old Souls Have A Harder Time Finding Love

Having an old soul is a double-edged sword when it comes to finding love. We look at things differently and feel things more deeply than most. We crave that once-in-a-lifetime love and won’t settle for much else. Here’s why:

  1. We Know Exactly Who We Are. This also means that we know exactly what we want and which qualities are dealbreakers in a partner. We don’t mind being alone because we’re secure with ourselves and we’re happy to wait for someone that fits with our lifestyles perfectly. Our patience is a virtue, especially in today’s dating scene.
  2. There’s No Such Thing As Settling In Our World. Settling isn’t a word in an old soul’s vocabulary because we know we deserve that soulmate kind of love — the kind our grandparents had. We’re looking for an unbreakable bond with unwavering love and loyalty. Settling would mean not living a truly fulfilled life, and we’re not willing to do it.
  3. Playing Games In A Relationship Is Not An Option. Dating games can actually hinder an old soul’s desire to pursue a relationship. “Ghosting” and “curving” are terms that play no part in our world — we just get frustrated and turned off. Trying to read a guy through vague texts doesn’t come naturally to us and we instantly give up and move on. Old souls require an honest and open relationship, so the modern age of online dating is very complicated and too shallow for us.
  4. We Continuously Over-Think Things Even When We Don’t Mean To Do It. Being deeply connected to our emotions and feelings often leads to us overthinking in romantic relationships. We worry about what our partners are thinking and doing and end up making assumptions. If the trust and love aren’t on solid ground, the overthinking gets worse and eventually will crumble our relationships.
  5. We Often Confuse Loving Someone With Helping Someone. We tend to want to save and help people more often than not. We feel an overwhelming joy helping and connecting with someone — even the partners we choose to share our beds with, which can hinder us. Instead of finding someone who can stand on their own, we choose partners that we can help and fix. Once we realize this, it might be too late and we end up getting hurt when the relationship backfires.
  6. Our standards are extremely high and occasionally unrealistic. Considering we hold ourselves to extremely high standards, it’s no surprise that we hold our relationships to the same level. We want true love and we won’t take anything else. Challenging ourselves in our career and our personal lives means that our relationships have to fit that standard as well. This isn’t always fair or feasible on our partners, we know, but we can’t help ourselves. We want and expect the best.
  7. We Don’t Have The Patience For Hookups. We won’t sleep with someone unless we have a mental and emotional connection first. Only then can the physical aspect of the relationship really take off. We won’t waste time on hooking up with someone only because we want to get laid. We’d rather wait to find that connection with someone first. Hooking up isn’t too common in an old soul’s world.
  8. We Can Be A Little TOO Honest. We’re honest and open with our feelings because we value honesty and straightforwardness. We have strong opinions, so when asked ours on any topic, we’re always 100% honest. When it comes to our relationship, we also don’t hesitate in voicing our opinions — even when they’re unwelcome. We try not to be unnecessarily cruel, but we know long-term relationships aren’t built on shadiness or passive-aggressiveness.
  9. We Prefer And Need Our Alone Time. We relish our alone time as it allows us to reflect on ourselves and our lives. We get to refocus on our goals and figure out where our lives are headed. We’re not co-dependent with our partners and love spending time solo to regroup and re-energize.
  10. We Don’t Want Diamonds, We Want Love Letters. Old souls prefer handwritten love letters over anything materialistic. If an argument happens, a thought-out apology is welcome over flowers or jewelry. Understanding why a disagreement took place is way more important than trying to brush it under the rug with gifts. There’s nothing more important to an old soul than understanding the emotions behind a disagreement.
28-year-young writer with a love for reality TV, boy bands, Tinder, and being the most bad ass single lady on the East Coast.