10 Relationship Goals That Actually Matter

The term “relationship goals” is hideously overused, applied to everything from wearing matching outfits with your partner to being with someone who remembers your morning Starbucks order. Of course, only certain ones actually matter when it comes to true happiness and longevity as a couple, so if you want a real relationship, strive for these things instead.

  1. Being able to travel together without driving each other nuts Traveling with anyone could easily go sour because it can be stressful and after a while, you could get sick of each other. If you’re dating someone you can travel with harmoniously, that could lead to a lot of amazing experiences together, minus the headache of constant bickering about what you’ll do and where you’ll go. This is one of the best relationship goals to shoot for because who doesn’t want to see the world?
  2. Getting along with each other’s parents If he’s really close with his parents, then you’ll want to be accepted by them so there won’t be any friction. Hopefully, the parents make this task easy for you, but if they don’t, there are still some tricks you can use. If you’re going to be together long-term, their family becomes yours and vice versa. If there’s tension there, it’s just not going to work.
  3. Not feeling pressured to be “done up” for your guy every day In the very beginning, you go to bed with a little makeup on and you’re very aware of the clothes you wear, but you can’t be like that forever. The real goal should be that you feel comfortable being with your guy no matter what you wear and he still looks at you like you’re a supermodel. Make it one of the goals in your relationship to know that he’ll be just as into you whether you’re in a full face of makeup or a pair of tattered sweats.
  4. Becoming best friends, not just romantic partners Yes, it’s important to have romantic chemistry, but being friends is important, as well. You should feel comfortable talking to each other and joking with each other just like you would with one of your pals. You’ve probably often heard it said that the best relationships have friendship at the root, which is why this is one of those relationship goals worth cultivating.
  5. Having the best sex you can together Some might think being in a long-term relationship means you have to accept that the passion will fade, but that’s a lie. Once you find someone you love, you both should continue to strive to please each other in bed. You may not do it as often as you used to in the beginning and your experience together may change, but this form of intimacy will keep you close over the years.
  6. Achieving conditionally unconditional love It’s tough because unconditional love is typically just reserved for family, but it’s possible to love your partner unconditionally… with conditions. By that, we mean that you should always accept and try to understand your partner regardless of the circumstances and love them anyway. However, this unconditional love cannot come at the expense of your health or well-being. There should be boundaries in place that are never crossed, and one of your relationship goals should be to respect one another’s.
  7. Being able to properly communicate Lack of communication can tank any relationship, no matter how much you love each other. Make it one of the goals for you relationship to master this skill. Learn how to speak about your feelings and resolve things properly without hurting each other so arguments can be resolved.
  8. Growing together and staying in love Being in a lasting relationship means you’ll both inevitably grow and change, but the real trick is doing that together so that you won’t be torn apart. Once you have this down, then there won’t be much that can tank your relationship.
  9. Having a full life outside of your relationship Being part of a happy couple is a good thing, but it shouldn’t come at the expense of everything else in your life. You should still have your own friends, hobbies, career, and routines that you maintain despite being part of a couple. Melding into one person will not only make you boring and unhappy, but it’s also a major relationship killer.
  10. Feeling like you’ve met your equal When it comes to relationship goals, this is pretty much the ultimate. We all know that relationships should be 50/50 as much as possible, though it’s natural for that scale to dip slightly one way or the other from time to time. You don’t want to feel like you’re mothering someone, nor do you want to be condescended to by someone who sees themselves more as a parental figure in your life than an equal partner. You should walk side by side through life, and if you can do that, you’re in good stead
Nicole Weaver is a staff writer for YourTango and regularly contributes to Hollywood, The Bolde, and Proud2BMe. She is a lover of all things entertainment meaning she spends most of her nights in New York binge watching television shows. Follow her on Twitter at @nikkibernice.