15 Ways To Keep The Passion Alive In A Long-Term Relationship

Staying in a relationship long-term with a partner you adore is obviously the ultimate dating goal, but once you reach it, you might find yourself asking the big question we all have: “Now what?” Well, now you have to keep the passion alive. It takes work, but if you’re dedicated to the relationship, you’ll enjoy it. Here are 15 ways to make sure things don’t fizzle out.

  1. Keep the communication open. We really underestimate the power of communication, but the true end of a relationship isn’t lack of sex, it’s lack of communication! Try to have a part of the day where it’s just you two talking without distractions, going over your day or whatever else you’d like to talk about. Keep the friendship alive in order to stay in love.
  2. Make a bucket list of new experiences. I’ve mentioned some things that should be on everyone’s relationship bucket list before. It’s good to have one so you both don’t get bored and you can make sure you’re experiencing life to the fullest. Having passion in your relationship is easier when you have passion for life.
  3. Help each other reach your goals. Other things could get in the way of a couple’s happiness, like feeling unfulfilled in other areas of life. To stop this from happening, be each other’s partners in conquering goals in any way you can. If you have to pick up more slack at home or help the other study, then try it.
  4. Designate a “no work” zone. These days, it’s hard to have a work-life balance thanks to technology, but your relationship should have its own safe place. Create a time in the week where it’s just you two and you’re completely away from work. Don’t talk about it, don’t do it, just be in the moment in your relationship.
  5. Adjust your expectations to be realistic. Thanks to movies and television, we have some high expectations of what a relationship should be like. But if you’re in it for the long haul, you can’t expect flowers and candy every week from your lover. Once you lower the bar, you will be so much happier when your partner does little things for you, like help out with chores.
  6. Have a scheduled date night every month. When you’re in a long-term relationship, it’s easy to get in a rut and stay there. But it’s important to get out, looking your best, and have a romantic night. Try doing this once a month at least to keep the love alive.
  7. Do things that make you feel sexy! Sadly, the passion fizzles out of the relationship because we get down on ourselves due to insecurity. When we don’t feel like we’re worthy of receiving love, it’s hard to accept it or give it. So do what makes you feel sexy, whether that’s doing your hair or nails, working out, or whatever does it for you. If you’re feeling yourself, then so will your partner.
  8. Change up your location. Even if you’re good about keeping up date night, things can get stale if you go to the same places all the time. Yelp some new restaurants or save up to go traveling to make things interesting.
  9. Never stop being a giver. People like to focus on what others aren’t doing, but if you want your relationship to stay hot, then focus more on giving. Are you being supportive? Are you taking initiative by planning dates? Are you showing how much you care? If not, fix it!
  10. Be open about each other’s fantasies. It would be a shame to go through all that time together and never be honest in the bedroom. Be open about everything you’ve wanted to try but have been holding back to up the passion levels.
  11. Flirt like you just started dating. It’s easy to default more into a friendship after being together for a long time, but you have to keep flirting. Keep things light and playful to keep the other interested and feeling hot.
  12. Don’t stop learning new things together. Don’t leave out those cooking or art classes on our bucket list. Creating memories often has to do with experiencing something new and this is a great way to do that.
  13. Never hold grudges. When you accept an “I’m sorry” and make the decision to stay in the relationship, then truly let things go. Nothing can tank passion like focusing on the negative rather than the positive.
  14. Keep others out of your relationship. At first you might want to brag a little about the love you found, but it could easily backfire. Friends and family could turn on your partner and get in the middle of your relationship. Want to protect your love? Keep others out of it!
  15. Spice things up with surprises. Do the unexpected by planning a surprise here or there. This could be sneaking a love note in your partner’s work bag to find later, or a surprise gift just to say I love you to show the other person you are thinking about them.
Nicole Weaver is a staff writer for YourTango and regularly contributes to Hollywood, The Bolde, and Proud2BMe. She is a lover of all things entertainment meaning she spends most of her nights in New York binge watching television shows. Follow her on Twitter at @nikkibernice.