How can you possibly know when you’re truly ready to put yourself out there again after ending a long-term relationship? If you’re thinking about breaking your love hiatus but you’re still a little bit apprehensive about taking the plunge back into the dating pool, here’s how to tell that it’s finally time:
You’ve waved goodbye to the bitter train.When you look back on your relationships, especially the ones that ended with you getting your heart broken, are you able to step back from the past drama, forgive and forget? If you’re no longer seeing your exes as proof of why all men are a-holes, then you might be ready to give it another go.
You’re comfortable being by yourself.Taking a break from relationships is one of the most empowering things you can do after having a string of bad relationship luck to prove to yourself that you don’t need anyone to make you happy. If you’re looking at dating as an opportunity to socialize with new people and less as an way to find someone to fill in gaps in your life, then it’s time for you to go out there and have fun!
You’ve refined your expectations about dating and guys.Gone are the long lists of the qualities Mr. Perfect should have, and in its place is a reasonable checklist of what Mr. Right For You should bring to the table. It’s not lowering your standards, it’s refining them.
You’re ready to date guys who fall outside your “type.”Another sign that you may be ready is broadening your ‘type’ of guy. If you’re ready to look at potential dating partners who go beyond the types you’re usually attracted to, then you’ve matured enough to know that opening up your horizons betters your chances at finding someone real.
You still believe in love.When your heart gets broken, it’s easy to get cynical about dating, but if you still believe in your heart of hearts that there are a lot of great guys out there you just haven’t met yet, then by all means — get out there, find them and don’t forget to have fun!
You’re completely over your ex.If you can’t remember the last time you looked at your ex’s Instagram or pined longingly for him while you cried at a rom-com, then you’re actually finaly over him! Welcome to the other side!
You’ve learned and grown from your past relationships. A sign that you’ve matured since your last relationship is having the ability to acknowledge the role you played in why it failed instead of putting the blame entirely on your ex (even if he probably deserves it). You know that the lessons you learn from the past can help you find a better relationship in the future, and you’re putting them into practice.
8. You’re confident in who you are (most of the time).You don’t have to strut out every day like Beyonce, but if you’re comfortable in your own skin and know who you are as a person, it can make dating a whole lot smoother. Confidence helps you avoid drama and see toxic people from a mile away so that you can avoid them altogether.
You’ve taken down your walls. You see potential dates as individuals with their own set of personality traits rather than making easy sweeping generalizations that “all men are (insert negative stereotype here).” You’re definitely ready if the possibility of making a connection with someone is something you look forward to rather than shrink away from.
You have grown up relationship goals. You know that romance isn’t just about over-the-top romantic gestures of flowers and fancy dinners. You want someone who can muck through the daily ups and downs of life with you — someone who knows when to grab a Snickers bar at the gas station on their way home because you’ve had a long day and it’ll make you feel better.
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