Everyone in your friend group seems to be pairing off with great guys, but you’re still solo. They keep telling you that the right guy will come along and love is just around the corner but is that actually the case? Here are 10 signs you’re going to be the last single girl in your crew:
- You don’t want kids. Not wanting kids doesn’t have any direct correlation with whether you can find “The One,” but it does take a lot of the pressure off of finding him. Without that ticking clock hanging over your head, you can relax and be patient in your search for love. So while others are doing the math on how soon after they start dating they’ll need to get engaged if they want baby number three by the time they’re 35, you are more likely to just let things happen naturally and see where they take you.
- You haven’t really tried dating sites. Sure, you may have swiped through a few faces (and glistening abs) on Tinder for fun or made a barebones OkCupid profile that you check once every few weeks, but you’ve never invested real time in searching these apps for actual, potential boyfriends. If finding a relationship was high up on your priority list, you would be utilizing every possible way to try and catch a winner. And, since online and app dating is where a huge chunk of singles find themselves nowadays, you would be on all of these sites replying to every guy who wrote you a message that wasn’t completely offensive or incoherent. Instead, you’re probably content to meet people the old-fashioned way at bars, parties, and your favorite late night drunk pizza stop.
- You don’t mind doing things on your own. You think a night in watching Netflix is heaven? You can eat by yourself at a restaurant without feeling self-conscious? If you’re nodding your head, chances are you don’t mind being on your own. Not constantly needing to have someone else around means you’re probably going to devote less time to trying to find permanent romantic company. You don’t have a “void” in your life that you’re trying to fill — you’re perfectly capable of filling your days and nights with plenty of great things that don’t include a significant other.
- You have ridiculous expectations. On the other end of the spectrum, you may be desperate to find your future husband, but your requirements list could be a little too lengthy. If he has to be blonde, from the greater Chicago area, a pediatrician, an Aries and have a passion for Gilmore Girls, you may have a much harder time locating Mr. Right. On top of these restrictions significantly narrowing your search, they also prevent you from seeing other great options out there. You may think you know exactly what you want, but you could miss out on someone amazing because you refuse to consider someone outside your “type.”
- You’ve never been in a relationship. Never having been in a relationship isn’t a black mark on your record shouting to the world, “This person is dysfunctional and alone!” but it does indicate that maybe you don’t need someone by your side to make your life feel complete. If you’ve never dated anyone long-term, you’ve probably never felt the need to be with another person romantically. If you have been looking, it’s pretty common to have more than one relationship before you get married, so a slow start could mean you end up finding a match a bit later than everyone else.
- You’re not very open. If you find yourself anxious about letting someone get to know you too well, you’re probably going to have trouble starting a relationship, let alone keeping one. Personal hang-ups that you find yourself struggling to confront will not only screw with your life, they’ll seep into your partner’s life too. And, if you’ve got some baggage that you’re not dealing with, it could be the death of any long-term relationship.
- You’ve got an ex you can’t let go of. Being stuck on your ex is almost guaranteed to ruin a budding relationship. True, falling in love with someone new can often help you get over a past boyfriend, but not always. If you can’t get over someone from years ago and constantly compare every guy to this one “ideal” man, everyone’s going to wind up pretty unsatisfied.
- Marriage seems impractical to you. This doesn’t exclude you from other long-term relationships, but the typical person looking for something more permanent is probably going to be interested in marriage. If the divorce rate, the idea of spending your entire life with only one other person or the seeming impossibility that you and your partner will grow and change in the exactly the same way all have you cringing at the idea of a white dress, you might find yourself sans significant other.
- Self-sabotage is your middle name. There are a million reasons you might purposefully or subconsciously screw up your relationships. Most likely, if you’re the kind of person who does this on the regular, you know that about yourself. You’ll have identified a pattern of picking the wrong types of guy, running away from commitment or rushing in too quickly. If you don’t figure out the root of your inner relationship turmoil, it’s unlikely you’ll be able to find a healthy future with a guy anytime soon.
- You’re selfish, in a good way. Selfish seems like a dirty word, but it can also mean that you’re making sure your own needs are met. If you really know yourself, you’ll probably have a good idea if you’re the type of person who wants to devote their life to someone else, whether that be a partner or a child. Some people genuinely want to live their own life to the fullest without having to take someone else into account, and that’s OKAY. I’m not suggesting you act like a jerk to everyone and just to serve number one, but it’s totally acceptable to know what you want and to go after it on your own.