12 Reasons NOT To Use Emojis When You’re Texting The Guy You’re Into

Emojis are cute and fun but they’re better saved for messages to your best girlfriends instead of the new guy you’re dating. Here are 12 reasons you should rethink sending that emoji to your new dude:

  1. Emojis can send the wrong message. There are lots of emojis that can mean different things to different people. For instance, the purple devil can look sexy to some and angry to others. The clown can be funny to someone who likes clowns and creepy AF to a person who still has nightmares of Stephen King’s “It.” Go easy on the emojis and if you have to use one, think about what it could mean to someone you hardly know before you press send.
  2. They feel childish or inappropriate. A string of happy-faced emojis or hearts after a flirtatious texting session can feel a bit too third grade. It’s like drawing pictures for each other instead of having an adult conversation. And let’s put it out there: the heart, bow and gooey-eyed emojis are usually what girlfriends love to send each other. They look a little too cutesy for many guys out there. How many straight, single and sexy guys do you know who send out pink throbbing heart emojis? Exactly.
  3. If you can’t say it, don’t emoji it. You shouldn’t hide behind emojis. If you’re shy about saying something to the guy, don’t use an emoji to get the message across. If you can’t say it in words, don’t say it!
  4. Emojis lack feeling. There are quite a few emotional emojis, like the red-faced angry emoji, the tearful emoji, or the green one that looks ready to puke. But they’re still a far cry from delivering emotion via text. Come on, we’re already reducing our feelings in social interaction by texting from behind screens instead of having real-life conversations. We don’t need emojis to further turn us into antisocial robots.
  5. It can seem like you don’t want to talk. If you’re sending smiley faces instead of a response to the text the guy sent you, it can seem like you don’t really want to talk much. He might think the string of laughing faces is a sign you think he’s hilarious but the convo’s dead, otherwise you’d be saying something!
  6. You need to test the connection without emojis. Texting a guy can be a great way to see if you get along well, see that he doesn’t have atrocious spelling, and ensure that you can talk about stuff. If you’re throwing out emojis instead of texts, you’re preventing that connection from blooming with cartoonish distractions.
  7. They can make you seem creepy. You might try to show you’re happy by using emojis but too much of that can make it look like you’re a little too high on life or you’re trying super hard to be pleasing. Oh, and it’s annoying AF! Who the hell smiles that much?
  8. Flirty emojis can seem desperate. If you don’t know the guy well and you’re already sending heart emojis or pictures of all genders holding hands, it might make it seem like you’re desperate to get into a relationship or fall in love.
  9. It can make him miss out on what you’re about. Just because you’re used to sending weird emojis to your friends, don’t think that he’s going to understand what you mean right off the bat. And, if you’re sending these mystical emojis in the hope he’ll get what you’re about, as a sort of test, it can backfire because he might just be completely confused about WTF you’re talking about. Rather show him what you’re about by being funny and interesting in text and seeing if he “gets” you when you’re real instead of relying on pictures.
  10. Don’t use them to get sex, please. A survey by Match.com has found that people who use emojis in their messages get more sex. One of the reasons is that it’s sometimes difficult to express what you feel so emojis come to the rescue. But you never really know how the message is going to be translated by the guy receiving it. Emojis also create clichéd responses. It’s much sexier to say what you feel in your unique way without the cookie cutter cartoon responses.
  11. Emojis don’t always add something meaningful to the conversation. It’s fine to use an emoji here or there, but if you’re using them in most of your texts it can seem lazy AF. Ask yourself: are the emojis really adding something special or meaningful to the message, or are you using them just because they’re fun? If you’re telling the guy you had a wonderful time on your date, you don’t need the smiley-faced emoji to get your point across. Skip the emojis and stick to your words. They matter much more.
  12. Leave something to the imagination. If you make a witty remark and then think you should add an emoji (or five) to your message to ensure you get the message across that you’re being funny and not sarcastic, it’s the texting equivalent of whipping out a chalkboard and drawing pictures to say what you mean in real life. Let your words speak for you so you can suss out if you and the guy have textual chemistry or not. Don’t waste your time with emojis that add color but not much substance.
Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.