13 Reasons He Hasn’t Texted You Back & Why You Shouldn’t Give AF

Think he lost your phone number or didn’t have time to text? Let’s cut through the crappy excuses he gives you for why he hasn’t responded to your last message and get to the real stuff. Here are 13 possible reasons he hasn’t texted you back and why it doesn’t actually matter. After all, you’re not hearing from him, which means it’s time to move on from him. Bye!

  1. He wasn’t as keen on you as he said. Sure, after the first few dates, he seemed really into you and even sang your praises. So what gives? Either he was lying to you or his feelings weren’t strong enough and they faded out. Whatever. It’s really his loss. Even if it’s not the most common, it’s definitely one of the most obvious reasons he hasn’t texted you back.
  2. He saw you as clingy. Maybe you double-texted him or “checked in” when he was quiet. It put him off. Maybe you did come on too strong, but who the hell cares? Clingy behavior to one person isn’t clingy behavior to everyone. The right guy won’t be put off by a measly text.
  3. He’s got a girlfriend. Yup, you’re the woman on the side. He was trying to keep his options open but then went back to his girlfriend. Screw him.
  4. He’s dating someone else who’s come along. While you were enjoying a few awesome dates with this guy, he was hooking up with other women from Tinder or he met another woman he really liked and ended up choosing her instead of you. It’s life. It happens. It’s better he’s flaking on you now instead of later.
  5. He doesn’t want a relationshipHe’s one of those guys who’s just dating for fun. Read: he likes hooking up. When he saw he wasn’t going to get sex out of you, he bolted. Adios, jerk. You don’t need to waste time on a guy who’s just looking for some fun he can get anywhere. You’re more special than that.
  6. He’s playing hard to get. He’s avoiding you because he thinks he shouldn’t look too interested in you, so he’ll probably text you in a few days instead of right away. Ugh, really? The “playing hard to get” game starts to smell of immaturity. It’s silly. You deserve a guy who’s going to be real with you.
  7. He was just looking for an ego boost. He really enjoyed spending time with you and texting you but now he’s bolted. What’s up with that? He might be one of those guys who love the fun of the chase because it makes them feel good, but they don’t care about the people they hurt in the process. Delete him now.
  8. He’s a coward. He wasn’t really into you but he didn’t want to say anything, so he thought he’d just fade you out by not replying to your texts. Loser. The best way to deal is to stop texting him and never reply if he does get in touch.
  9. You’ve texted him too much. There are guys out there who think that texting is a marathon, not a sprint. They get weird when a woman texts them too much. It’s like it’s just too much for their little incapable fingers. Whatever. You shouldn’t feel bad for wanting to talk to someone and get to know them. Clearly, this kind of guy is just in it for casual texting and relationships of the same lukewarm variety.
  10. He’s too busy. Being a jerk, that is. Okay, wait — he might really be busy and unable to answer your text for a few hours, but surely he can squeeze in a text by the end of the day? Then the “busy” reason makes sense and you should go on and fill your day with fabulousness instead of obsessing over when he’s going to reply to you. If he’s taking days to get back to you,  though, it’s not good enough. Tell him you’re too busy to waste your time on his nonsense.
  11. He doesn’t have anything to say. Often, guys will text when they have something to say or a direct question to answer, but it still sucks when he goes AWOL after you mentioned something you thought was interesting and wanted to share with him. Look, the important thing here is that you realize he’s not on the same level as you are and move on to find someone who will talk to you about anything and everything in a way that feels natural.
  12. He doesn’t feel the need to text you because you’re dating. Ah, here’s the guy who was texting you daily when he first met you but then texted less and less as time went on. He was all about putting in lots of effort to make you his, and now that you’re his GF, he feels he can stop. Texting can be an important part of a relationship, especially if you don’t see each other that much. If he can’t stay in touch and make an effort, he’s not worth it.
  13. He’s scared of getting serious. He loved talking to and texting you, but when things started to get more serious, he bolted. He’s a player who can’t commit and doesn’t want to enter a real relationship. Or, he just wants to keep lots of women available to him if he needs them, without getting serious with any of them. Ugh. Don’t waste another second on such a man-child! You can do better and he’s doing you a favor by not texting you back.
Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.