There are many ways that you can tell whether a guy likes you and is playing it cool or if he’s just not interested However, that all depends on what kind of guy he is. Shy guys have different tells than confident ones. Thankfully, there are some universal metrics by which you can judge these things. Take them with a pinch of salt and trust your gut. You don’t want to miss an opportunity just because you were looking in the wrong direction and didn’t see them looking at you with puppy-dog eyes from across the room. Read on for the signs a guy likes you (even if he’s desperately trying to keep his cool).
Sometimes, but not always. Wouldn’t it be great if you could tell right away whether the guy you’re crushing on is into you without wasting time and energy or embarrassing yourself if he’s not feeling it? Sadly, it doesn’t always work that way. A lot of guys aren’t as open with their emotions as women tend to be. This means they like to play it cool until you give them the green light to make their move.
That being said, if a guy is super into you, the signs are clear as long as you know what you’re looking for. While he might not scream from the rooftop that he’s attracted to you and wants to take you out, his actions will speak louder than any words could.
Signs a guy likes you more than you think
- He smiles at you. You don’t have to know many guys to know that this is by no means a standard expectation. The bar is on the floor, yes, but hey, it’s nice to see a smile. It shows that he likes you but also that he isn’t playing games with your feelings. He’s not trying to play hard to get or to get you to chase him. He just wants to show you he likes you. There’s something to be said about putting your cards on the table like that, even in this small way.
- He gives you small gifts. These are thoughtful, everyday gifts, not a trip to the Alps. You don’t have to break the bank to show someone that you’re thinking of them. Not by a long shot. Even replacing their toilet paper without asking or bringing home chocolate buttons from the train station because they had a bad day are thoughtful enough gestures to convey those feelings. These gestures are without ego or publicity. They’re all about you. He’s also keen on you if he read that book you talked about last week too. These gestures are all about showing you he wants to learn more about you in a very unself-conscious way.
- He compliments you. Not in a “your pretty” way (yes, complete with terrible grammar and very low effort) but in a genuine way. He’ll say that he admires your personality, how you conduct yourself with other people, or how you give your time up to help your sister. He will see the little things. Compliments will rarely be physical too. They’re nice to hear, don’t get me wrong, but you don’t remember them as long as a compliment to something that you can control. Believe me.
- He introduces you to his friends. This is a great way of knowing you’re important to someone and is one of the biggest signs a guy really likes you. It’s also his way of having the best of both worlds. You get to see two parts of his world combining. Plus, you have him in common, so you won’t run out of things to say.
- He invites you to share hobbies. Does he nervously ask if you want to watch his basketball game at the weekend? Or if you want to go to his favorite band with him? There’s a huge deal of trust and intimacy in those gestures, so don’t dismiss them. He is opening himself up to potential judgment because he wants to share things he loves with you.
- He shares his thoughts with you. These don’t have to be profound Platonic musings, but the fact that he’s thinking about you during the day is nice. It’s like those moments when you’re thinking about him and you check your phone and he’s just texted. It brings connection even through distance.
- He texts first. Again, you guys aren’t playing games here. There’s no sense of chase or imbalanced power dynamics here. You trust each other and you can see that he likes you because he makes it clear. He doesn’t make you feel anxious or stressed by putting you in an ambiguous situation.
- He texts you good morning and goodnight. These are simple gestures, but it tells you one thing: he listens to your needs. He knows that you appreciate these routines, and he will happily do that for you. There’s nothing worse than communicating a need and having the other person say it’s silly.
- He sends great memes. This means you have the same taste in humor. You’re probably on the same side of TikTok, too. You can be comfortable with each other and you associate him with safety. This might sound unromantic, but trust me. That means that your relationship can build and grow over time. This will involve lots of experimentation and mistakes, but you will make them together.
- He makes excuses to touch you. One of the biggest signs a guy really likes you is when he goes out of his way to touch you all the time. I don’t mean sexually, and he isn’t doing this because he thinks it’s going to lead you straight to the bedroom. Instead, it’s his way of being close to you because he’s so nuts about you that he can never get close enough. It’s actually pretty sweet.
- He gets jealous when you talk to other guys. I’m not talking about that ugly jealousy that manifests as rage and machismo but that subtle insecurity that rears its head when another guy shows interest in you and he worries that you might be taken away from him. If he wasn’t into you, he wouldn’t really care if someone else stole you away.
- He makes sure you can rely on him. Even if he tends to be somewhat flaky in the rest of his life, with you, he’s always consistent and reliable. If he says he’s going to be somewhere, he’s there. You can trust him to be right by your side whenever you need him and he never makes it feel like a burden or a problem. That’s one of the biggest signs this guy really likes you. Like, a lot.
- You’re all over his socials. By this, I mean that he’s not shy when it comes to sharing couple selfies or mentioning you in his posts. He doesn’t try to keep you secret and doesn’t get bent out of shape when you tag him in a post of yours. He’s proud for people to know that the’s with you and that the’s loving it.
- He has the memory of an elephant. From your birthday to the first time you guys hung out on a date, he remembers important dates in your life and your lives together as a couple so that he can celebrate them in the future. If you weren’t significant to him, why would he bother?
- You catch him staring. I’m not talking about a creepy stare that makes you want to crawl out of your skin. A guy who likes you but is playing it cool won’t be able to help but look at you. However, the minute he gets caught, he averts his gaze and goes red. He doesn’t want to weird you out
There you are, a few ways of identifying whether the guy you like likes you back as more than a friend. Keep an eye out!