Ever notice how some people always seem to be on the hunt for love but somehow never quite catch it? Here’s a little insight into what might be going on.
1. They look for perfection.
So you’ve got this mental image of ‘the one,’ right? They’ve got to tick all these boxes – looks, humor, brains, and maybe a love for dogs. But here’s a little truth bomb: chasing this ideal person might be why you’re always chasing. Real connections are about imperfections meeting, meshing, and sometimes clashing. It’s about finding beauty in the real, not the imagined. Maybe it’s time to let go of that checklist and start appreciating people for their unique mix of quirks and qualities.
2. They forget to love themselves first.
RuPaul’s catchphrase is pretty much etched into the collective consciousness at this point, so there’s no excuse for not internalizing it. It’s not just fluffy advice; it’s solid gold. If you’re always on the lookout for someone else to complete you, you might be missing out on the joy of being your own soulmate. Spend some time discovering what makes you tick, what makes you laugh, and what makes you feel alive. It’s about building a relationship with yourself that’s so solid, anyone else is just a wonderful bonus.
3. Want A Partner? Attract Love With The Power Of Your Mind.
Sweetn is a new research-based startup that shows you how to call love into your life with the power of your mind. Take our quiz, and try our tools—they can transform your energy and your love life in a few weeks. Just click here.
4. They’re in love with the idea of love.
Romantic comedies, love songs, and fairytales have painted this picture of love that’s all grand gestures and fireworks. But if you’re more smitten with the concept of love than the person in front of you, you might be setting yourself up for a fall. Real love is in the everyday – it’s in understanding, growing together, and sometimes, just sitting in comfortable silence. It’s about finding joy in the reality, not just the fantasy.
5. They speed through relationships rather than enjoying the process.
Rushing through relationships like there’s no tomorrow can mean missing out on the good stuff – the deep conversations, the silly inside jokes, the gradual intertwining of lives. It’s like skipping the first few chapters of a book and then wondering why you can’t get into the story. Take your time, savor the moments, and let things unfold at their own pace. You might find that the best parts of a relationship are in the details you notice along the way.
6. They’re always looking for validation from romantic partners.
It’s great to feel loved and appreciated, but if you’re always seeking validation from your partner, it might be time to ask yourself why. Constantly needing reassurance can be a sign that you’re not feeling super secure in yourself. Work on building your self-esteem – not from the compliments or affection from others, but from your own sense of self-worth. Remember, you’re awesome, with or without someone else’s approval.
7. They forget to put boundaries in place.
Sometimes, in the quest to keep someone around, you might find yourself bending on things you said you never would. But here’s the deal – your values and boundaries are part of what makes you, you. Don’t water yourself down for the sake of a relationship. The right person will respect your boundaries and love you all the more for them.
8. They expect a fairytale romance.
If you’re expecting every day to feel like a scene out of a rom-com, you might end up feeling let down. Real relationships have their share of mundane moments and disagreements. And that’s okay! It’s these everyday experiences, both good and bad, that deepen your connection and build a real, lasting bond.
9. They depend on their partner to be happy.
Putting all your happiness eggs in the relationship basket? That’s a risky move. Your happiness should come from a mix of sources – your passions, your friendships, your achievements. A partner should add to your happiness, sure, but they shouldn’t be the sole source of it. Keep nurturing your own life and interests; it’ll make your personal happiness more robust and your relationships healthier.
10. They’re scared of being alone.
Being single isn’t something to dread; it’s an opportunity. It’s your time to explore, grow, and find out what you really want in life – and in a partner. If the thought of being alone feels scary, it might mean you’re jumping into relationships for the wrong reasons. Embrace your solo time as a chance for self-discovery and personal growth.
11. They ignore red flags.
Ever seen warning signs in a relationship but just kept going, hoping they’d magically disappear? Yeah, we’ve all been there. But those red flags are important. They’re little signals saying, “Hey, something’s not right here.” Pay attention to them. It might not be easy, but addressing red flags early on can save you from a lot of future heartache.
12. They think life begins when they’re in love.
Some folks think snagging a relationship will suddenly make everything in life fall into place. But here’s the kicker: if you’re not happy on your own, a relationship isn’t going to flip that switch for you. Chasing love without finding happiness in your own life first is like trying to fill a cup with a hole in the bottom. Focus on what makes you happy outside of a relationship; it’s amazing how attractive happiness can be.
13. They believe a partner will complete them.
Ever heard someone say they’re looking for their ‘other half’? That might sound sweet, but it puts a lot of pressure on finding someone to feel complete. The truth is, you’re not a half – you’re a whole, all by yourself. Looking for someone to complete you can lead to co-dependency, rather than a healthy, independent relationship. Embrace your completeness, and look for someone who complements, not completes you.
14. They’re serial monogamists.
Some people hop from one relationship to the next without taking a breather. It’s like they’re scared to just stand still for a second. But here’s the thing – those gaps between relationships? They’re golden. They’re your time to reflect, figure out what you really want, and grow. Pausing between relationships can give you a clearer perspective on what you’re truly looking for.
15. They prioritize quantity over quality.
In the world of swipes and likes, it’s easy to get caught up in the numbers game. But racking up dates like they’re high scores can mean you’re focusing more on the quantity of your love life rather than the quality. Slow down and focus on building deeper, more meaningful connections, even if that means going on fewer dates. It’s about finding the right fit, not just any fit.
16. They overlook the importance of friendship.
Some people forget that at the heart of every great romantic relationship is a strong foundation of friendship. They’re so focused on the romance and passion that they overlook the buddy aspect. But hey, being friends with your partner is crucial. It means you’ve got each other’s backs, you enjoy hanging out, and you genuinely like each other – and isn’t that kind of the point?
17. They’re scared of being vulnerable.
Opening up and being vulnerable can be scary. It means letting someone see the real you, warts and all. But those who are always chasing love sometimes keep those walls up high, fearing that vulnerability equals weakness. The truth? It’s the exact opposite. Vulnerability is where deep, genuine connections are made. Letting your guard down might just be the key to letting someone truly special in.
