Some people are just wise beyond their years, and if your friends have been calling you an old lady from the time you were in elementary school, chances are you might be a grandma at heart. Here’s how you know for sure.
- You always have snacks in your bag. Whenever you’re out late (which is pretty rare, if you’re honest) and one of your friends complains of hunger, you’re always prepared. Your bag is practically a full-scale survival kit for any needs that might arise, serious or otherwise. Apart from the lifetime supply of trail mix and protein bars, you have Band-Aids, pepper spray, safety pins, and, of course, a whole bag of tampons. Being called a “lifesaver” is an everyday occurrence for you.
- You call your friends to make sure they got home safe. Whether they live a block away from you or in another state, you always insist on calling or texting to make sure your friends got home safe. Even if it’s 1 p.m. on a Tuesday, you’ll be calling them up to check. I mean, you never know what could happen, right? Better safe than sorry. And if they’re honest, it’s one the things they love most about you because it shows how much you love them.
- Friday nights are best spent with Netflix or a good book. It’s not like you don’t know how to party, you just choose not to. Peer pressure doesn’t seem to affect you the way it does most people. You’re perfectly content to spend your weekend curled up at home with a good book or Stranger Things. The concept of #FOMO is completely foreign to you, and in case you didn’t know, there’s a new word for that too.
- People are always asking for your advice. It’s an open secret. You’re the best when it comes to advice. Whether someone’s just gone through an awful breakup or they’re simply on the fence about getting that amazing haircut, you’re always prepared with words of wisdom. And if all they need is a good cry, you’ve got a closet full of Kleenex and have the world’s most comforting shoulder to cry on. In fact, most people consider this to be your superpower.
- You think the people your age are children. When you were six, you felt like you were 12 and when you were 12, you felt like you were 2o. Now, even though technically everyone around you is an adult, they still seem like children to you. At this point, you’re about 80 inside and you know that that is the best age to be. Life experience and innate wisdom have their perks. As does your respect for a good night’s sleep and true friendship.
- You’re still not totally sure what “YOLO” means. It’s not like you never text, but you don’t exactly do it enthusiastically, and you understand maybe 20% of all the LOLs and ILYs and STFUs that you’re sent. There are just too many to keep track of. Luckily, you also happen to be pretty clever, so you know ways to work around your knowledge gaps. In fact, you probably use Urban Dictionary more than Instagram if you’re honest, so at least you’re kind of good at bluffing.
- You always bring a sweater, just in case. It can be 90 degrees outside and you’ll still have a jacket on your arm when you leave the house. I mean seriously, grocery stores and restaurants are twice as cold in summer as they are in winter, and that’s just not something you’re willing to endure for the sake of convenience. You’ve probably had nightmares about finding yourself in a movie theater in July without your trusty jacket, and that’s just not something you’re willing to let happen.
- You’ve memorized every episode of Friends but never quite got the Gossip Girl hype. Whenever you turn on the TV and see Monica and Rachel fighting over a condom or Ross carrying his monkey around on his shoulder, you will drop everything, life-threatening emergencies included, to watch the reruns in their entirety. And while you’ve tried to watch Gossip Girl, there’s just something about the teenage angle that you can’t get quite wrap your head around. To put it simply, you never actually were a teenager at heart, so it just doesn’t make any sense to you.
- Tinder and the idea of internet dating in general is baffling and a little terrifying to you. Everyone you know has tried dating apps, and some of your friends have even found lasting relationships through them, but something about it just feels weird to you. The thought of starting a conversation with someone you probably won’t ever meet with the assumption that you’re kind of auditioning for a relationship or deciding if you want to have sex with them is just weird to you. You’ll take a dinner date with a man you’ve just accidentally spilled coffee on any day. Meet-cutes aren’t just for romcoms.
- You’re uncompromising when it comes to grammar. Were you the middle schooler who was always correcting your friends about “you and I” instead of “me and you”? Does it drive you crazy when your friends say “like” too much? These are all dead giveaways that you are, in fact, a grandma at heart. You’ve probably gotten a lot better about this over the years, and chances are, you’re pretty good at ignoring it these days, but you’re still meticulous about all those apostrophes, and you spell out every single word in your texts. Compromise can only go so far after all.
