If You’re Afraid Of Dying Alone, Remember These 11 Things

If you consider yourself forever single, it’s easy to develop a fear of dying alone one day. After all, if you never find a partner (or choose not to have one) and don’t have kids, who the hell will be there when you take your last breath? Newsflash: You probably won’t die alone, and thinking you will is causing unnecessary stress. Here’s why it’s important not to buy into this idea or let it get you down.

  1. Marriage is no guarantee of not dying alone. You might think that having a husband will ensure that you have someone next to you when you kick the bucket, but let’s be realistic: you could get divorced long before you die. Many couples who think they’re going to be together forever ended up parting ways before death comes along.
  2. Men tend to die before women. If you want to marry a man, you have to understand that men tend to die before women do, which is a fact all around the globe. That means even if you do end up with your soulmate, he might not be there when you die. So is chasing him quite literally down to death really worth it if the only reason you’re doing so is not to be alone in your final minutes or hours? Nope.
  3. You also can’t rely on kids. Having children¬†guaranteeing that you won’t die alone is another myth. Just think of all the kids who grow up and leave their parents, and some who don’t even come back to help their folks when they’re aging or alone. It sucks but it’s true.
  4. You’re never actually alone. You don’t need a romantic partner to feel less alone. There are loads of other relationships that can keep loneliness at bay, such as friendships, relationships with family members, and other new connections you make along the way. There are many people who will be there for you when you’re ill and/or facing death. It doesn’t have to be a romantic partner.
  5. Being alone isn’t a bad thing either. In fact, being single is a blessing! If you want to be alone, you can be. There’s nothing wrong with choosing this life path. It’s actually really rewarding. It also doesn’t mean you’ll die alone because of the above-mentioned relationships you can have with loads of people around you. Or, you could decide to face death in the same way that you face life: independently and with strength.
  6. Everyone dies alone. Hate to get all dark on you but it’s true. You can be surrounded by 100 people when you pass into the next life and you’re still going to be taking the journey alone. So does it really matter if you end up having a husband or a best friend at your bedside? Not at all. Besides, you’re probably not going to be worried about being single when you’re facing death, trust me.
  7. It’s more important to live happily. We sometimes focus too much on the fear of dying alone. What about living unhappily? It’s never worth it to settle for a boyfriend or husband who doesn’t make us 100% happy just so that we have someone around. Dying might last for minutes or hours, but you might still have decades and decades of life ahead of you (if you’re lucky). Better to be happy and fulfilled during your life than worry about your time of death.
  8. We can’t control death. We’re all going to die and we can’t control how or when it happens, and if we’re alone when it does, but that doesn’t matter. What matters is life and we can control how we choose to live and ensure our own happiness. If single life makes us feel happy then we should choose it and make the most of life while we have it in our grasp. It’s better to live in a way that fulfills you rather than thinking of the best way to die. That’s just morbid.
  9. A soulmate doesn’t have to be what gives your life meaning. Sometimes, what forms part of the fear of dying alone is the idea that you might wish you’d found “The One” during your lifetime (thanks to all the romcoms you watched) when you’re lying on your deathbed. But the truth is, as long as you’ve lived a life filled with meaning and happiness, you’ve done a good job. In fact, you’ve done a better job with your life than if you’d put your happiness in someone else’s hands.
  10. This is just another thing to make single women feel ashamed. Where did we get the idea that being alone is a bad thing? Society makes us feel guilty about being single in so many different ways, and dying alone is one of the ways in which it tries to instill fear into us. But enough is enough! There are far greater things to fear in this life, so we really don’t need to make ourselves sick with the idea that we’ll never find The One.
  11. What should you really fear? Instead of being afraid of dying alone, one of the more important things to fear is finding the wrong person to spend our days with. A life of misery is far greater than a solitary death.
Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.