Having Anxiety Doesn’t Make Me Undateable

Having Anxiety Doesn’t Make Me Undateable

I’ve been struggling with anxiety for as long as I can remember, and even though it’s something that wreaks havoc into my life at times, it’s only part of who I am. I’ve been dumped by guys before for having this illness, but I never asked for it. It’s frustrating when you’re written off because of a mental ailment that you work your ass off to combat and I’m sick of hiding my struggle because some guys can’t handle it. The fact that anxiety disorders are still stigmatized this way is ridiculous. Yes, I have anxiety — but it doesn’t mean I’m undateable.

  1. My demons just have a difference face. Everyone has flaws — anxiety just happens to be that one thing in my life that’s tough to handle at times. That doesn’t make me any less human or worthy of what everyone else is entitled to. If a guy is going to look down on me for having a mental illness, he’s a narrow-minded jerk who needs to learn about empathy and life.
  2. I work my ass off to keep myself healthy. I do a lot of work on myself to fight the dark parts of anxiety and it’s something I’ve grown to accept as part of my life. When I date someone, I’m not asking them to be my babysitter — I’m simply hoping they’ll accept those defects about me that I’ve come to accept myself.
  3. I need support just like anyone else. For some women, they need a man to help them with the financial burden of life or to help with the tough chores around the house. I just need someone to love me in my weakest moments because I know those moments will inevitably happen. I’m no different than any other woman who needs that strong shoulder to lean on, but the shoulder I’m looking for needs to support a different type of weight.
  4. I’m not disabled by my illness — I’m disabled because of the perception of it. Having anxiety isn’t what disables me. Sure, it’s hard as hell at times to live with it, but what’s even worse is the way guys look at me when I tell them I battle this monster sometimes. There’s nothing more crippling than my illness itself than being cast aside because I’m not “normal” or the perfect kind of woman a guy expects me to be.
  5. I’m a normal woman with all the same other qualities to love. I’m just like any other woman, with amazing qualities about me that balance out the crap I can’t help. I’m genuinely caring and kind and I go above and beyond to make the person in my life and my heart feel cared about — so why am I less worthy just because of one small piece of me when everything else is perfectly normal?
  6. My anxiety proves just how strong I am. If anything, my anxiety should be seen as a remarkable piece of my overall character for being able to live with and combat this monster for as long as I have. Anxiety has taught me to be resilient and stronger than ever, and it’s just one more challenge I’m determined to conquer. Sure, going through a spell will be tough, but I have the willingness to get through it whether I have someone in my life or not.
  7. I’m accepting of flaws because I have my own. I’m always willing to accept flaws in guys that I meet knowing full well I’m not perfect myself. I wish that I didn’t have a giant red stamp on me marked “DAMAGED” just because I was born with something that I had to learn to live my life with differently. I suppose the right guy for me won’t hesitate to stand by me despite this, but it still doesn’t change the fact that it hurts when I’m dismissed for something I can’t help.
  8. Every other part of my life is normal and exciting. I live a normal life and have fun like everyone else. I’m incredibly social and you’ll find me with a happy and laughing smile on my face most of the time. I have a willingness to live, and just because certain times in my life will be overshadowed by anxiety doesn’t mean that there aren’t bright days to be had with me as well. It’s called life, and it’s not always sunshine and rainbows.
  9. The love I have to give is infinite because I know to appreciate the good parts of life. My anxiety has taught me not to take a second of happiness and fun for granted because I never quite know when the ugliness of my illness is going to make its appearance. In the meantime, I love to enjoy life and each day to the fullest extent. Anxiety will never kill me, but being negatively looked at because I have it kills my spirit a little bit at times.
  10. I’m amazing despite my anxiety. No matter what mental ailment I might have, I’m still one amazing person with a lot to offer. Like I said, my anxiety is only a small part of my life and it doesn’t make me undateable. I have fabulous qualities that still make me a great partner in life and I’m sick of being judged negatively for something most people know nothing about. I have anxiety, not the plague — I’m a catch despite it.