Are you even 12 and on the internet if you haven’t anxiously googled this question on a private browser on your parents’ desktop? Answer: nope, it’s a universal question. There’s nothing to be embarrassed about asking these questions, either. No matter how experienced or otherwise you might feel, don’t stress about it. The important thing to remember is that everyone else started just where you are, googling this very question. I’m excited to be part of this grand tradition, so without further ado, let’s get onto some of the best kissing tips to try.
- Start slow. Don’t be too keen, particularly if this is your first kiss. You don’t want to startle them, so just stay calm. Everyone has sweaty palms and everyone in this life, no matter how attractive, has to make the first move at some point. Your first kiss will not be the best kiss you ever have, I can say this with some confidence. Even if you have kissed people before, the first time kissing a new person always takes some time to get on the same page. Don’t blame yourself for your inexperience!
- Ask for consent. This isn’t just one of the best kissing tips, it’s vital. I don’t care what anyone says, consent is always sexy. Stopping when things are getting hot, looking someone directly in the eye, and asking if you can kiss them. There’s something almost untoward in that because it’s brave and clear and focused. There’s nothing accidental or forced, but it’s still dramatic and powerful.
- Use your hands. Don’t just stand next to each other like limp fish. This isn’t the time to leave room for Jesus. Touch each other, try their knees, pull their shirt towards you to initiate the kiss, or touch their face. Be gentle and slow and you will get everyone in the mood, trust me. It makes the person feel connected and intimate, and no one will be weirded out because it’s such a compassionate gesture.
- Make eye contact and keep looking at their lips. This can work while you’re making out and pausing to catch your breath, or in the immediate run-up. It’s a great way of intensifying everything, quickening the heartbeat, and feeling seen. You’re soaking in the experience, not trying to rush through it. It’s hot.
- Kiss his cheek first. Keep things chaste to start with, even when things are getting to the boiling point, it’ll drive him mad. Linger close to his face and even smell the nape of his neck. Is anyone else getting goosebumps?
- Kiss his neck and collarbones. If you feel like you’re in need of a little mix-up when you’re making out, kiss his neck and collarbones. They’re sensitive, and a great gateway to hickeys – that is, if you’re a teenage boy. But hey, each to his own. There are many parts of the body that can be explored, so why not start exploring. Pushing someone up against a wall also helps certain … gravitational angles, so I’d definitely recommend that.
- Cool it with the tongue. Certainly at first. There are few people that can use tongue when kissing in a way that actually feels good, rather than just strange. Tongues are weird things, after all, so don’t be disheartened if your partner gently moves on from your initial attempts. Generally speaking, you should move pretty slow, so no washing machines, please. Think of it like you’re passing a coin between each other’s tongues. Something like that.
- Suck on the lower lip. Bite it, if they’re into it. It creates a new pressure point and feels good for both parties. Be careful not to bite too hard though, and if you draw blood, you’re biting way too hard. Until you have a conversation about boundaries, that is, then it’s fair game if they’re comfortable.
- Flick your tongue on their upper lip. Depending on how you kiss, most people fit their lips between each other. This often means that the upper lip is neglected, so giving it some attention every now and then when it feels good is worth a try. It’s playful and not many people will tell you to be fun, but sex should be!
- If you’re enjoying yourself, show it! Everyone loves to know that they’re doing the right thing, so when something feels good it helps the other person of you shamelessly moan or hum to yourself. It’s how we all read each other and get better at understanding needs. Communicate verbally, too – it’s always a turn-on to be told what to do. Believe me. Moan in his ear and see where it gets you.
Now, this list won’t work for everyone, but it’s a great starting out point. Don’t stress if you feel inexperienced. Just think that anytime you’re kissing someone, it’s the first time they’re kissing you too. They’re just as nervous, and you will both get better over time. We’re all in the same boat!
