When someone betrays our trust, it’s like a crack has formed in the foundation of our relationship. And when that betrayal comes in the form of cheating, those cracks can feel like gaping chasms. The big question that often follows is: Can a cheating man change and stay faithful? While there’s no one-size-fits-all answer, there are certain actions and changes in behavior that can indicate a commitment to fidelity moving forward. It’s a tough road, but for those determined to walk it, here are nine things that need to be part of the journey.
1. He takes full responsibility for his actions.
If a man’s stepped out his partner, owning up to his actions is step one. No excuses, no blaming stress or saying “it just happened.” He needs to face the music and acknowledge he messed up. This means he understands the hurt he caused and doesn’t skirt around it. He’s not asking you to forget it, either. By standing up and saying, “I did this, and I’m sorry,” he’s laying the first brick in rebuilding trust.
2. He agrees to be 100% transparent moving forward.
After trust is shattered, transparency is the glue that starts putting it back together. If he’s serious about changing, he’s got to be an open book — and I’m not talking about just for a few weeks. His life has to be an open tab: texts, emails, the works. It’s not a forever deal, but until trust is reestablished, his willingness to share is key. And this shouldn’t feel like a prison sentence to him; if he’s truly committed to change, he’ll understand it’s about re-earning that trust.
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4. He makes his past an open book.
Dragging skeletons out of the closet isn’t fun, but it’s necessary. If he’s committed to change, he can’t keep old flames or flings under wraps. He needs to be upfront about his history because any unturned stone could be a potential landmine for future trust. Being open about his past mistakes doesn’t just show he’s willing to be transparent; it shows he’s ready to learn from them too.
5. He puts in consistent effort to change.
Talking a good game is easy; playing a good game is hard. Consistent effort over time is the only real proof of change. It’s the daily grind of showing up, being present, and working on whatever issues led him astray in the first place. Maybe it’s therapy, self-reflection, or just hard conversations at times when it would be easier to walk away. This isn’t about grand gestures; it’s about the long haul and the everyday commitment to being better.
6. He’s patient when it comes to the healing process.
He gets it—fixing what’s broken won’t happen overnight. He’s in it for the long haul, understanding that the healing process is more marathon than sprint. So if you’re having a day where the hurt is hitting hard, he’s not throwing in the towel. He’s not pressing you to ‘get over it’ already. Patience in this case means he’s giving you, and the relationship, the space and time to heal on their own terms. This is about giving the wound the time it needs to become a scar.
7. He’s willing to seek help.
There’s no shame in admitting you can’t do it all on your own, and when a man’s willing to seek help, it shows he’s serious about change. Whether it’s couple’s therapy, individual counseling, or support groups—whatever works—he’s ready to get external help to make sure he’s moving forward in a healthy way. It’s not a sign of weakness; it’s a sign of strength. It’s him saying, “I don’t have all the answers, but I’m looking for them.”
8. He works to rebuild trust.
Rebuilding trust isn’t just about avoiding the same mistakes. It’s about small, daily actions that show he’s reliable again. He says he’ll do something? He does it. He plans to be somewhere? He’s there. He keeps no secrets, tells no lies, and is there when you need him. It’s those little bricks of reliability that start to restore the trust that was lost. It’s about being consistent, dependable, and available.
9. He’s unfailingly honest.
The truth can hurt, but for someone looking to make amends, it’s non-negotiable. He needs to tell it like it is, even when it might be easier to tell a white lie. Late from work because he grabbed a drink with a buddy? He tells you. An old flame texts out of the blue? You’re the first to know. This unwavering honesty is what will slowly dissolve the walls of doubt and let trust grow back. It’s not just about not lying—it’s about being proactive with the truth.
10. He dedicates himself to personal development.
True change comes from within, and a man committed to transformation understands that. He dedicates time to personal development—reading books, maybe taking a class that challenges him, or developing a new, healthier routine. This isn’t about impressing anyone or ticking boxes. It’s about him recognizing that if he wants to be better for you, he has to be better for himself first. Personal development is a sign he’s building a stronger foundation, not just patching up cracks. It’s a commitment to being the kind of man who doesn’t find himself in the same hole twice.
