In a world full of TMI and what often feels like a total lack of privacy, it’s important to remember that some aspects of our lives are actually meant to be kept just for us (and maybe the very few people we’re closest to). Here are some things that you’re completely justified in keeping to yourself — they’re your business and no one else’s!
1. Your financial status
Your bank account balance, debts, or financial struggles aren’t something that need to be discussed with other people (unless of course you’re going into business or buying a house with them). Sharing these details can not only lead to them giving you unsolicited advice but can also change how people perceive and treat you.
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2. The nitty-gritty details of your personal relationships
The intricacies of your relationships with family, friends, or your partner often involve sensitive and deeply personal emotions and experiences. Protecting the privacy of these relationships maintains their sanctity and makes sure everyone feels respected. Obviously, it’s great to have a gossip with your best friend about a fight you had with your partner, but be mindful about what you’re coming out with in casual conversation.
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3. Your living arrangements
Whether you’re renting, living with roommates, or still at your family’s home, your living situation is your personal business. It’s tied to your current life phase and financial choices, which don’t really need to be open for public scrutiny. That’s not to say you need to hide the fact that you just bought a new house or that your landlord is awesome, of course. You just don’t need to justify the way you’re living to anyone else.
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4. Your health issues
Details about your physical or mental health are intimate and private. You have every right to keep your health matters private and confidential, sharing them only with those who need to know or those you genuinely wish to tell. That being said, if discussing them would help raise awareness or alleviate the burden you feel, by all means, open up!
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5. Your major life challenges
Everyone faces challenges, but the struggles you’re dealing with—be it at work, in personal development, or in other areas—are your own to share at your discretion. Keeping these challenges private can sometimes help you navigate them with less external pressure. People always have too much to say about everyone else’s problems. If you want to cut out the noise, learn to keep things to yourself.
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6. Your spiritual beliefs
Your spiritual or religious beliefs are deeply personal. Your relationship to your god(s) is unique to you and isn’t up for discussion or debate with anyone else. They shape your perspective and values but don’t need to be justified or explained to other people unless you choose to share.
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7. Your future goals and dreams
While it can be motivational to share your aspirations with other people, keeping your most ambitious dreams to yourself can protect them from the dampening effect of external doubts or negativity. Share them when you’re ready or have made significant strides towards achieving them, or if you’ve met someone who’s on a similar path and you can push one another forward.
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8. Your issues or arguments with other people
Fights or misunderstandings between you and other people are best resolved between the two of you rather than dragging other people into the drama. Publicizing these issues will only complicate the situation and invite unnecessary opinions or interference, which will inevitably keep things from getting solved quickly. Be mature — work it out with the other person and leave everyone else out of it.
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9. The things you do for charity
Acts of kindness or charity mean the most when they’re done without fanfare or drawing attention to yourself. Sharing the fact that you do a lot of volunteering at your local soup kitchen or give a lot of money to a certain cause can sometimes shift the focus from the act itself to the accolades you receive for it, which then diminishes the genuine altruism behind it.
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10. Your political opinions
This is a tough one because the personal is very much political, and sitting silently while the world falls apart feels very irresponsible and wrong. Honestly, it’s important to be vocal about our beliefs and use your civic right to exercise your vote and your right to protest. That being said, your deepest political beliefs and opinions might be something you choose to keep private, especially in environments where discussions about it can lead to conflict or tension.
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11. Your passwords or other security information
This might seem obvious, but the details of your digital life, including passwords, security questions, or other sensitive access information, should be closely guarded and not shared. Don’t be handing this info out willy-nilly, even if you think you can trust the other person. It’s far too easy for sensitive stuff like this to end up in the wrong hands, and you really don’t want to take the chance.
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12. Your workplace gossip or opinions
Conversations about your boss or colleagues, workplace dynamics, or your opinions about your job can have unforeseen consequences if shared with the wrong person or in the wrong context. Obviously, feel free to vent to the high heavens to your best friend, but even then, try to keep it to a minimum.
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13. Your insecurities or self-doubt
While it’s healthy to talk about insecurities or doubts with close friends or family, broadcasting your constant self-doubt widely can make you a target for manipulation or negativity. You want to command respect, and while vulnerability can certainly do that — you’re human, not a robot, after all — it’s possible to take it too far. You’re better off confiding in people you know you can truly trust.
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14. Your personal convictions or controversies
Your stance on controversial issues or deep-seated convictions might be elements of your identity that you choose to keep private, especially in mixed company or when talking about it can lead to major drama. There’s a time and a place to be vocal about what ou believe in. When it’s not that time and place, maybe leave it out.
15. Your major life changes or decisions
Whether you’re contemplating a major career shift, considering moving to a new city, or making significant changes in your personal life, these decisions can be kept private until you’re ready to make them public. This can help you to make clear, uninfluenced decisions.
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