Easy Things To Talk About When You’re Nervous Around New People

Easy Things To Talk About When You’re Nervous Around New People

Starting a conversation doesn’t have to be daunting even if you’re nervous around new people (which plenty of people are). With these easy topics, you can turn those awkward silences into enjoyable chats. Just remember to keep it casual, be genuinely interested in their responses, and most importantly, be yourself.

1. Start with Safe and Neutral Topics Like the Weather.

Alright, so talking about the weather might not win any originality awards, but it’s a classic for a reason — it’s small talk 101. It’s something everyone experiences, and it’s super easy to talk about. “Crazy how much it’s rained this week, huh?” It’s a light way to break the ice without diving into anything too personal. Plus, it can lead to other topics like outdoor activities, favorite seasons, or even travel plans. And who knows, you might both discover a shared love for snowboarding or beach vacations!

2. Strike Up a Conversation About Shared Interests.

Finding common ground can turn awkward small talk into an awesome conversation. Maybe you overhear them mention a band you love, or you spot a book in their hand you’ve read. Jump on that! “Oh, you like [Band Name]? I saw them live last year!” It’s an instant connection, and it’s way more fun to chat about stuff you’re both into. This is a great place to start when you’re nervous around new people, and it might help you feel a lot more relaxed as you realize how much you have in common.

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4. Ask About Their Hobbies, Work, Family, or Anything Else You’re Curious About.

People usually light up when they talk about things they’re passionate about no matter how nervous they are around new people. Asking about their hobbies or what they do for a living is a great way to get to know them. “Do you have any hobbies?” or “What’s your job like?” shows you’re interested in their life. It’s about giving them the spotlight to share what’s important to them. And it’s not just polite – you might find their stories fascinating, or you might learn something new and cool.

5. Make an observation. 

Paying a compliment or commenting on something you notice about them can make the conversation more personal. “That’s a cool watch – is there a story behind it?” It shows you’re observant and interested in them as an individual. Just make sure your comments are respectful and kind. It’s a simple way to create a more meaningful interaction that goes beyond surface-level chit-chat.

6. Share a short and relevant story about your own life.

Sharing a bit about yourself can make the conversation feel more like a two-way street. Maybe you talk about a recent trip, a funny incident, or a little victory at work. “I recently tried this new recipe, and I was amazed it didn’t end in disaster!” It adds a personal touch and shows you’re open to sharing your life too. Just keep it brief and relevant – it’s a conversation, not a monologue.

7. Ask them for Recommendations on good places to eat and drink.

Everyone loves sharing their favorite spots, and asking for recommendations is a great conversation starter. “I’m always on the hunt for a good coffee place – got any favorites?” It shows you value their opinion and can lead to a bunch of other topics. Plus, you might end up with a great list of new places to check out. It’s a win-win!

8. Give Genuine Compliments to the Other Person.

A genuine compliment can be a real confidence booster. “I love your sense of style, it’s really unique,” or “You have a great laugh, it’s so infectious!” can make someone’s day. It’s important to be sincere – people can usually tell when you’re just making something up. A heartfelt compliment can brighten their mood and make them feel appreciated.

9. Don’t Just Wait for Your Turn to Talk.

Active listening is crucial. It’s not just about you waiting for a pause to jump in with your story. Show you’re engaged by nodding, responding, and asking follow-up questions. “That sounds interesting, tell me more about it.” It’s about creating a real connection, not just exchanging words. When you actively listen, you make the other person feel heard and valued.

10. Don’t Try to Be Someone You’re Not.

Pretending to be someone else is like building a house on sand – it won’t hold up for long. No matter how nervous you get around new people, just be yourself. If you’re into quirky hobbies, own it. If you love bad jokes, go for it. Authenticity is attractive, and it’s much easier than trying to maintain a facade. Plus, it’s the best way to find people who like you for you.

11. Talk About a Recent Movie or TV Show.

Movies and TV shows are great icebreakers. “Have you seen any good movies lately?” It’s an easy question that can spark a fun conversation about favorite genres, actors, or plot twists. Most people have at least one show or movie they’re passionate about, and it can reveal a lot about their interests. Plus, you might get some cool recommendations for your next movie night.

12. Discuss Current Events, but Keep It Light.

Bringing up current events can be a smart way to get the conversation flowing, but remember to keep it light and steer clear of controversial topics. “Did you hear about the new park opening downtown?” It’s about finding a common ground in the things happening around you. These kinds of topics can lead to broader discussions about interests and opinions without getting too heavy.

13. Ask About Their Dream Vacation.

Asking about dream vacations is like talking about hopes and dreams – it’s fun and uplifting. “If you could travel anywhere, where would you go?” This question can lead to exciting conversations about travel aspirations, past adventures, or cultural interests. It’s a great way to learn more about what excites them and share your own travel dreams.

14. Share Your Latest Fun Experience.

Telling a story about a fun or interesting experience you had recently can be a great way to engage someone. “I tried this new hobby, and it was surprisingly fun!” It shows you’re open to sharing bits of your life and can be a nice segue into them sharing their experiences. Plus, it adds a personal touch to the conversation.

15. Ask About what they love doing with their free time.

Getting to know how someone likes to relax can give you insights into their personality. “What do you like to do to unwind after a busy week?” Whether it’s reading, hiking, or binge-watching shows, this question can open up a more personal line of conversation. It’s also a nice way to exchange ideas on relaxation and leisure activities.

16. Take a Deep Breath and Relax.

Remember, it’s just a conversation, not a performance. If you’re feeling nervous, take a deep breath and try to relax. Chances are, the other person might be feeling the same way. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself to be witty or brilliant. Just be present in the moment and enjoy the chat. The more relaxed you are, the more natural the conversation will flow.

Originally from Australia, Emma Mills graduated from the University of Queensland with a dual degree in Philosophy and Applied Linguistics before moving to Los Angeles to become a professional matchmaker (a bit of a shift, obviously). Since 2015, she has helped more than 150 people find lasting love and remains passionate about bringing amazing singletons together.

Emma is also the author of the upcoming Hachette publication, "Off the Beaten Track: Finding Lasting Love in the Least Likely of Places," due out in January 2025.
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