How To Feel Whole When You’re Convinced You Need A Relationship

It might feel like you’re endlessly anticipating your soulmate to show his face, but it’s important to comprehend that you’re a whole person with or without a partner. You can’t let your singleness stop you from living your best life right now just because you’re a party of one. Here’s how to patch up that hole in your heart and feel whole without a guy.

  1. Invest in your life wholeheartedly. One of the top perks of being single is getting to be completely and unapologetically selfish. Now’s the time to focus on yourself in a way that you can’t quite do when you have a significant other. When loneliness kicks in, invest in creating the best possible life. Whether that’s meditating, working out, shopping, or simply painting your nails, do things that make you feel good inside.
  2. Broaden your horizons. Sometimes we feel depleted when we’re simply just bored. This is where it will benefit you to explore your hobbies and passions and even develop some new ones. Were you a volleyball player growing up? Maybe you should look into joining an adult league. Have you always wanted to learn how to play an instrument or try a paint and sip session? Sign up for classes with your peers. Who knows, you might even meet a great guy while you’re out and about exploring your new hobbies.
  3. Don’t just sit there, do something. You can’t sit at home alone hugging a container of Haagen Dazs, wallowing in your self-pity, and expect to feel great. You have to get out there and live your life. If you’re a sports enthusiast, engage your inner super fan and start attending more sporting events of your choice. Go hiking. Get a group of girlfriends together and tear up the town! Just get out there and DO things. When you’re engaging in activities outside of looking for a guy, you’re going to feel less like something is missing and more like you’re already fulfilled.
  4. Call on your girlfriends. Use this as an opportunity to strengthen your bonds with the ladies who’ve always had your back regardless of your relationship status. If you’re up for new adventures, call up your friends and have them tag along. Added bonus: when you’re single, you can freely spend time with friends of both sexes without feeling like you’re committing a relationship faux pas. Relish in the moment.
  5. Change your surroundings. Whether you need a distraction or a change of pace or both, redecorating is a proactive way to spice up your environment. It will help you to feel more inspired and alleviate some of the stress you’re feeling while providing you with your own private oasis to escape to. Whether it’s getting some new bedding or changing up the color scheme in your living room, it can make you feel like a whole new you.
  6. Tap into your spiritual side. It’s when you feel your lowest that you’ll more than likely feel the closest connection to your spirituality. Draw it in and let it fill you. There’s a sense of peace and comfort that transcends understanding when you tap into your spiritual side. If you start allowing yourself the opportunity to be fulfilled in different aspects of your life, you’re less prone to feeling empty in your singleness.
  7. Put an expiration date on serial dating. Get out your marker and highlight the crap out of this line because it’s my best chunk of wisdom to throw at you. I know it seems like swiping right on the hottest matches will fill the void in your heart, and maybe for a New York minute it will, but it’s not healthy and will only leave you feeling disappointed and probably more upset than before. If you absolutely must date a few contenders at a time, make sure to set reasonable limits and proceed with caution.
  8. Focus on what you have, not what you don’t. Gratitude will benefit you in more ways than you realize. You’ll be surprised at how much your perspective will change when you begin to shift your focus on all of the wonderful blessings you have, rather than zoning in on the emptiness you feel over the things that you haven’t obtained just yet. Change your perspective, change your life.
  9. Work, work, work. Motivating yourself to focus on your career will make you feel empowered AF. Kick any debt to the curb and take on as much extra work as you feel fits into your lifestyle right now. You’ll never regret investing in your future if you’re working hard at building it up to the best of your ability. The sense of accomplishment you’ll feel in return is something that nobody can take away.
  10. Make your bucket list and start checking things off it. Goal setting is relevant to setting yourself up for success. You can take it a step further by making your own bucket list. Include things that you’ve always wanted to do and use this as an excuse to brainstorm and research new ideas and experiences to go for. Be sure to be intentional about checking off each accomplishment, and don’t hesitate to indulge.
Mix 1 part momma + 1 part writer + 1 part hairstylist. Add the love of laughter, adventure, and caffeine. Blend well with a passion for country music and hockey. Sprinkle with sass, and that's me.
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