When Your Friends Don’t Like Your Boyfriend, You Should Listen

In a perfect world, your friends and family would adore every guy that you liked enough to call your boyfriend. Of course, that’s not always how it works. Sometimes, you’re super into a new guy and your friends just can’t get on board. While you may want to shrug their opinion off, here’s why you should listen when your friends don’t like your boyfriend:

  1. They’re just trying to help. You may think that your BFFs are jealous of your newfound happiness… but then why are they your BFFs? Chances are, they’re just trying to help and make sure that you’re making the right decisions. They’re coming from a place of love and care, even if you don’t realize that at first.
  2. They know you better than you know yourself. How many times have your friends picked you up when you fell? You’ve gone to them when you’ve been ghosted, when you’ve had the first date from hell, when you’ve finally met a decent guy and when you’re not sure how to decode a text message. It’s safe to say that they know you better than you even know yourself. So if they don’t approve of this new guy, you need to think about that.
  3. They don’t want to say they hate your BF. If you think that they want to be negative about your new relationship, you’re totally wrong. When your friends tell you how they really feel, they’re freaking out about it. They wish they could say the opposite: that they love him and think he’s the right guy for you. They seriously aren’t enjoying this.
  4. They see things that you can’t. You’re currently blinded by the new couple love bubble and nothing can stop you from obsessing over your new boyfriend. You won’t be able to see what your friends see… at least not right now. You should be happy that they’re on the outside looking in and can see the situation for how it really is.
  5. They’re just doing their best friend job. There’s no point having best friends if you’re not going to give each other advice about love and life. Stop the anger and start being grateful for them for being there for you. There’s no reason to be pissed off at your friends when they’re only looking out for you.
  6. They would want you to do the same. It’s super tempting to freak out and get really mad at your friends for not liking your boyfriend. Instead of going down that negative road, why not think about what you would do? The truth is that you would for sure tell them how you really felt about their own relationships. You wouldn’t feel like a good friend if you lied. Once you can see things from their perspective, you might have some more clarity about the whole situation.
  7. They’re not obligated to love him. You’re the one in your relationship. You have to be comfortable with what’s going on and who you’re with. It’s easy to forget that your friends aren’t required to love the person that you love, but it’s true. Do you love all the guys that they’ve dated? Of course not.
  8. They would feel weird staying silent. You might think that if you hated your friend’s boyfriend, you wouldn’t say a single thing, and yet that might just be the worst idea ever. Your friends would probably feel really bad staying quiet about this person in your life. They would think about it all the time and it would be like the elephant in the room. It’s not rocket science to figure out how awkward that would be.
  9. They have a wealth of experience that you should trust. Your BFFs are right there with you, dating and trying to find someone worthy of being called a boyfriend. It doesn’t make sense to totally disregard their experience and expertise. You’re not doing yourself or them justice if you don’t listen to what they’re trying to tell you.
  10. They don’t necessarily want you to dump him. You may think this, but it’s not always the case. They could have a legit reason for not liking your boyfriend (for example, they might think he’s a bit lazy and unmotivated). Maybe you’ll realize that your friends have shone a light on a problem in your relationship and you can talk to your boyfriend about it and make things better. And then you’ll be glad that they spoke up, right?
Aya Tsintziras is a freelance lifestyle writer and editor from Toronto, Canada. In addition to writing about dating and relationships for Bolde, she also writes about movies, TV, and video games for ScreenRant and GameRant. She has a Political Science degree from the University of Toronto and a Masters of Journalism from Ryerson University. You can find her on Twitter @ayatsintziras and on Instagram @aya.tsintziras.