Harsh Truth You Need To Hear: If He’s Not Texting You, He Doesn’t Like You

Texting is likely your main form of communication with a new guy (and pretty much everyone else in your life), at least at first. This can be great when the dude that you’re crushing on is blowing up your phone — you feel interesting, desirable, and like hot sh*t, basically. However, it can also be horrible when you’re waiting for him to message you and it just never happens. While it’s easy to convince yourself that his battery died or he’s just busy, that’s probably not the case. The fact is if he’s not texting you, he probably doesn’t like you.

  1. Every guy that you’ve dated has texted first. Take a trip down memory texting lane and you’ll realize that this is the truth. Your ex-boyfriends got in touch to plan dates or just say hey. Even your almost boyfriends were texting machines and always wanted to know what you were up to from time to time.
  2. It proves that he’s not thinking about you. Here’s a simple formula: when a guy likes you, he thinks about you. When he thinks about you, he texts you. If that’s just not happening then it’s time to realize that you’re just not on his mind. You shouldn’t feel bad about that. It’s not about you, it’s about him. Not everyone is going to like you just like you don’t like every guy that you go out with, right?
  3. He should come up with random reasons to get in touch. Did he order pizza for lunch? Drink one too many coffees before an important work meeting and ended up super jittery and shaky? Is he trying to make you laugh? When a guy is into you, he comes up with super random reasons to text you. You should be getting those messages — and they should definitely put a smile on your face since they prove that he’s interested.
  4. He doesn’t want to move things forward. If he likes you, he’s going to make sure that you know it. He won’t want you to date someone else and forget about him. He won’t be able to get you off his mind and that’s honestly what you want to wait for. Why would he want to sit back and see if you’re going to move things forward? What would the point of that be?
  5. You can’t be the one doing all the work. Do you really want to be the only one making this new relationship work? Do you want to text first every time, whether you’re saying hi after a few days of silence or asking him if he wants to go out again? Not really.
  6. You don’t want to like someone more than they like you. You’ve probably been in this unfortunate situation before and you know that it sucks. You spend every minute of every day second-guessing, wondering if you said or did something wrong. That’s not a way to live. You want someone who likes you just as much as you like them.
  7. He’s not the only guy in the world. When you’re single AF, it’s tempting to want to keep dating someone because it’s taken you this long to meet someone decent. You figure that although things aren’t perfect and he’s not texting you, at least you like someone and it wouldn’t make sense to walk away. You definitely need to stop this train of thought. He’s not the only guy in the world. You can definitely wait for a guy who’s going to text you.
  8. He’s afraid to tell you the truthYou may think that you should keep texting this guy because if he didn’t like you, he would tell you. That’s not the case. He’s probably scared to tell you that he doesn’t see you in a romantic way. Of course he should man up and be honest, but he might be way too immature for that.
  9. This isn’t going to end well. You can’t force someone to fall in love with you or even like you. If you could, life would be so much simpler and you would probably be married by now. If he’s not texting you, this isn’t going to end well. You’re going to force him to tell you that nothing is going to happen and that rejection is going to sting, or you’re going to text him so much that he’s not going to be super nice. These are definitely not things that you want to happen.
  10. There are no excuses. You can tell yourself all the stories in the world and they’re not going to become reality. No, he’s not ignoring you because he likes you too much. No, he’s not just busy or a hard worker. And no, he doesn’t hate texting. If he likes you, you’re going to be aware of it because he won’t stop texting you. Period.
Aya Tsintziras is a freelance lifestyle writer and editor from Toronto, Canada. In addition to writing about dating and relationships for Bolde, she also writes about movies, TV, and video games for ScreenRant and GameRant. She has a Political Science degree from the University of Toronto and a Masters of Journalism from Ryerson University. You can find her on Twitter @ayatsintziras and on Instagram @aya.tsintziras.