If He’s Telling You These Things, Don’t Fall For Them — They’re Blatant Lies

Of course you should trust the words of your partner, but only to a certain extent. If he’s telling you any of these things, stop ignoring your BS radar and remind yourself that you know better than to believe such nonsense.

  1. “I want to take things slow.” It might be music to your ears when the guy you’ve started dating tells you that he wants to take things at a slow pace, but he shouldn’t say this if you guys are in an official relationship. TBH, it’s a nice way of saying, “We’ve had great times but I’m not sure about you, so I’m backtracking.”
  2. “I don’t know why my ex is texting me.” Oh please. It’s not like she’s only done it once, right? The fact that you’ve asked him about it means that it’s worrying you, and there could be reason for that. At the very least, he would know why she’s texting him, even if he doesn’t particularly want to chat to her.
  3. “I’ve been so busy.” If you want to spend more quality time with your boyfriend because it feels like you never get to have any lately and he dishes you this excuse, he’s not busy — he’s just not making you a priority. No one should be too busy to make time for their significant other.
  4. “We should never have broken up.” When your ex texts you this, you might think he still has feelings for you. But the truth is, he could be lonely or bored on a Saturday night. If his actions don’t match up to what he’s saying, then you shouldn’t hold on to hope that he’s going to be a great boyfriend this time around.
  5. “You’re the one that got away.” Oh please. You didn’t slip out of his fingers — you made the choice to walk away. Why? Because there was a good reason for you to break up with him or get over him. Don’t lose sight of that.
  6. “I’m not into the idea of marriage.” If your boyfriend tells you this after you’ve been dating for years, there’s a problem. Marriage might not be for everyone, but it is unnerving to be with someone who doesn’t want to make such a big commitment after being in a long-term relationship. Maybe he’s really saying that he’s not sure he sees you in the long-term picture of his life.
  7. “I didn’t think you’d get upset.” Your boyfriend does something to piss you off, such as meet up with a female friend he recently made at work, and you have a huge fight about it when you find out. He uses this excuse with you, but don’t buy it. Of course he knows that you’d be upset, otherwise he wouldn’t have hidden the information from you.
  8. “She’s just a friend.” Okay, so he does have female friends, but the one he’s always mentioning? The one who texts him late at night? The one he seems to confide in? If they’re really close, then it’s probably the case that there are some feelings lingering there. He can’t just write it off as friendship.
  9. “Don’t you know that I love you?” When you confront your partner about something that’s upset you and he gives you this as an answer, it’s easy to think that he really does love you. But it’s not an answer to your question, is it? He’s probably just trying to divert your attention and change the subject a bit while coming out on top as the loving boyfriend.
  10. “I swear on my father’s grave nothing happened.” You ask about your boyfriend’s whereabouts and if he cheated on you, and he gives you this dramatic answer. It’s just too much. No one has to swear on another person’s grave to be believed. Their words should hold water on their own. If your guy has to resort to such measures, then he’s probably lying.
  11. “My phone was on silent all day.” He was at work and busy, so maybe he didn’t check his phone. But wait, really? Come on, he’s always glued to his phone when you’re with him, now suddenly he can’t check your messages? He just didn’t feel like answering.
Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.