If You’re A Hopeless Romantic, You Probably Hate How Dating Is Changing

Dating is hard enough on its own, but for hopeless romantics, it’s downright unbearable. All we want is to meet a great guy who makes us feel like the life-long faith we’ve had in passionate, long-lasting love was worth it. Unfortunately, we usually have to put up with these terrible parts of dating instead:

  1. Emoji conversations are killing real conversations. Those stupid emojis need to stop — it’s like people depend on them to get through conversations and don’t know how to communicate without them. There’s nothing worse than chatting to a guy who then replies to date confirmations with an emoji that sort of looks like it’s either smiling or clenching its teeth in dread. Is the date on or off? Is he changing his mind? Just speak, will you?!
  2. Group dates are way too popular. When the guy finally asks you out on a date, but then suggests bringing friends along, it’s an instant turn-off. It’s like he’s afraid to be alone with a woman or needs emotional support during the date. Or worse, he wants his best friends to screen you.
  3. There’s a serious lack of chivalry. The date seems to be going well, then the check arrives and the guy starts calculating everything he consumed so that he doesn’t have to pay a cent towards your meal. Nice, huh? Or maybe you’re stepping out of his car and he doesn’t bother opening the door, making a wisecrack that women want to be independent these days. Bring back the gentlemen, please.
  4. There are too many options. There are so many ways to date, from real-life meetings, to dating apps, to blind dates set up by friends. It’s enough to make us helpless romantics feel a bit jaded about dating. It makes it hard to even fully enjoy hanging out with a guy because we’re wondering how many other women he’s hit up on Tinder.
  5. Love is being replaced by sex. There are also so many easy ways to get sex these days that people aren’t really looking to invest in love or relationships. And honestly, why should they when they can get laid with minimal effort? Dating apps will tell them just how far they need to drive to get some within the next hour. As a result, romance these days expires sooner than milk.
  6. Guys don’t dress up. Dates aren’t these big events they used to be, perhaps because people are going on them all the time. That also means a lot of guys won’t even care about making the best impression with their appearance. They’ll roll up in a dirty, baggy shirt or look like they haven’t washed their hair in the past month. Check, please!
  7. It’s easy to end things the cowardly way. People are relying on technology to ghost, bench and moon their dates. It’s so crappy being on the receiving end of all that silent treatment. Whatever happened to manning up and telling someone that you’re not interested? It really isn’t that hard.
  8. Making things Facebook-official is stupidly stressful. After dating someone for a while, the dreaded, “Should we make our relationship official on Facebook?” conversation comes up. For hopeless romantics, this is important because it means the guy wants to share the news with 459 of his closest friends. But it’s awkward AF to have the conversation, and if he doesn’t seem too keen to change his status, then we’ll fear that he’s not actually into the relationship. It’s way too easy for social media to create relationship problems that might not even have been there to begin with.
  9. Most dates are one-hit wonders. Getting amped for a first date only for it to go nowhere sucks, and it happens all the time. Hopeless romantics just don’t have time for guys wanting a quick hookup or casual dating without the strings, and the scary number of players that are out there sure as hell puts us off looking for something serious.
  10. A lot of guys don’t make much effort anymore. What ever happened to calling a woman to ask her out on a date and having a real conversation instead of firing off a “sup” text? Talk about making a woman feel special… not. It’s almost impressive how lazy some of these dudes are.
  11. There’s too much pressure to play it cool. We can’t show we’re too eager or interested; otherwise, we get labeled as clingy. We can’t double text; otherwise, we’re too needy. Enough with all those little rules and games. We need to be able to do what we want, and if that scares guys away, screw it. It’s time to get real. We helpless romantics have to save the world of dating before all those “too cool to care” people destroy it for good.
Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.