How The Single Life Is Prepping You For Commitment

If you feel bad that you’re still single, stop right there. You should be proud to be living your life, going after your dreams (both the career and romantic kind), and totally rocking things solo. You may feel like a total failure sometimes if your friends are coupled up and you can’t seem to go on a second date, but that’s crazy, because you’re closer to a relationship than you may think. Here are 10 ways the single life is definitely preparing you for commitment:

  1. You’re a fully formed human being. People always say you shouldn’t wait for a guy to make you feel whole, and that couldn’t be more true. You’re not sitting there twirling your hair and waiting for someone else to bring you true contentment. You’re making yourself happy and being yourself. Basically, you’ve done the work on yourself and any guy would be super lucky to be with you.
  2. You’re compassionate. I’m not saying that single girls are more compassionate than girls in a relationship, because that would be crazy. But when you’re solo, you spend a lot of time alone, and when you spend time alone you tend to think a lot. You’re not usually thinking about how awesome you are – if your mind tends to focus on the struggles you’re facing, that’s pretty normal. That makes you compassionate, and will make you an amazing girlfriend.
  3. You have love in your life already. No boyfriend to buy Christmas presents for? No problem. You have besties who are practically sisters by this point. You have loving parents/sisters/brothers/etc. You have coworkers who are good friends (or maybe a cute dog if you freelance).
  4. You’re self-sufficient. You’re independent and used to taking care of yourself, but that doesn’t mean you’re not able to commit to someone else. In fact, your self-sufficiency is the perfect prep for when you find the right guy. You’re so ready for a mature relationship and will never expect a man to buy you things – you can buy anything you want for yourself.
  5. You won’t take love for granted. If you’ve in a super long-term partnership, it’s inevitable that you will start taking this person and your love for granted. Since you’ve been rocking the single lifestyle for a while, you really want love. When it happens to you, you’ll remember the nights you spent at home alone with only the glowing TV screen for company. You’ll appreciate every moment you spend with your new guy.
  6. You won’t waste anyone’s time. You won’t waste your own time on bad dates that will clearly go nowhere. You won’t waste a guy’s time, either, by leading him on when you know he’s a cool person but not right for you. This is a great quality to have and definitely beats seeming desperate for a boyfriend.
  7. Life is all about your outlook. If you approach a first date thinking it’s going to suck and that you’ll never be in a relationship ever again, it’s partly your fault if it goes super badly. If you can stay upbeat and optimistic about finding love, it still won’t be easy, but your mindset is half the battle. Believe in love and once you find it, you’ll be ready for commitment.
  8. You know what it’s like to be single. So many women who are in perpetual long-term relationships like to complain that they wish they could see what it was like to be single. You know that sounds pretty crazy. You’ll never forget the ups and downs of the single life, and you look forward to the time when you’re truly in love again.
  9. You observe everything and everyone. When we’re caught in a new guy or part of a loving couple, we tend to have tunnel vision and, let’s admit it, we can get pretty self-involved. You’re single, so you’re not at that stage. Instead, you’ve observed your couple friends or given your best friend advice. You may be single but you know people who aren’t, and it’s all part of your learning experience.
  10. We’re all single at some point. Yes, even your BFF who never seems to go a hot minute without a new boyfriend (even if she’s only single for, well, a month). You will find love, this is just your time to be solo for a little bit. So enjoy it.
Aya Tsintziras is a freelance lifestyle writer and editor. She shares gluten-free, dairy-free recipes and personal stories on her food blog, She loves coffee, barre classes and pop culture.