Dealing with negative people can make you feel like you’re losing your mind. No matter how many good things happen in their lives and around them, they always find a reason to complain about it and bring the mood down. If you’re not careful, this can start to wear you down, and that’s not just right. Instead, you have to find ways to deal with these energy vampires so you can keep your head up and your sanity intact.
1. Set healthy Boundaries for Yourself.
Boundaries aren’t just for romantic relationships — they need to be there for every single interaction we have in life. This is especially true when trying to figure out how to interact with negative people without allowing their negativity to impact your own mindset. You can only take so much, after all. You can listen and offer support, but it’s important to recognize when their negativity starts affecting your mood and to step back accordingly.
2. Don’t Play into Their Drama.
It’s easy to get drawn into other people’s Oscar-worthy performances, but you have to rise above that as much as possible. Try to steer conversations towards more neutral topics whenever you can rather than indulging in their need to cause a scene. Don’t outright ignore what they’re saying, but change the topic to something more positive (or at least with less room for constant complaints). You have to redirect the energy of the conversation to something that’s less painful for you to listen to and be part of, it’s as simple as that.
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4. Limit The Time You Spend Around Them.
While completely avoiding negative people isn’t always possible, you can certainly limit the amount of time you spend with them, within reason. It just means being a little strategic. If you know that a meeting with a particularly pessimistic person is coming up, plan to have it at a time when you’re not fed up and feel like you can let it go in one ear and out the other. Plus, make sure to plan some enjoyable activities or downtime afterward to help reset your brain and shrug the negativity off. You have to do what you have to do to stay in a good place.
5. Don’t let them drag you into their negative mindset.
When you’re regularly around negative people, it’s tough to stay upbeat, but you have to fight against the current here. This means actively doing stuff that makes you happy and surrounding yourself with positive influences. I don’t know, maybe even keep a gratitude journal or something that allows you to keep reinforcing your positivity and shuts out the noise of the Debbie Downers you’re surrounded by on a daily basis. Don’t stoop to their level!
6. Respond to Them, But Don’t React.
When dealing with negative people, your first instinct is probably going to be to react emotionally, especially when this is a regularly occurring thing. However, you also probably know by now that that’s not going to be very effective. Take a minute to breathe and think before you speak. When someone’s bad attitude gets you amped up, process why that is and what effect your reaction will have, if any. You can self-reflect, so use it to your advantage and be the bigger person.
7. Offer Them Something Positive, But Don’t Expect Miracles.
While it’s good to try to bring a positive attitude into your interactions with negative people, you’ll have to manage your expectations here when it comes to how much impact you can actually have. You can’t force someone to change their outlook. Of course, offering a different perspective is valuable, but if they want to change, it’s going to have to come from them. It’s about being a positive influence without the pressure of trying to overwrite someone’s mood or personality.
8. Hear them out — they might be desperate for it.
Sometimes, people just need to feel heard, which is why your old pal “active listening” could really help you deal with someone who’s being negative. This obviously doesn’t mean you have to agree with them, but showing that you are listening and understanding their perspective can sometimes be enough to get them to chill out. Make eye contact, nod, and let them know you get what they’re saying. If they feel like someone is on their side (or at least willing to hear them out), it could have a positive effect on their attitude (fingers crossed).
9. Prevent The Conversation From getting any more heated.
When someone is being negative, it’s way too easy to get drawn into an argument or to start getting hyped up over something little. Instead, flex your diplomacy skills by staying cool, calm, and collected. Even if it’s total BS, saying something like, “Yeah, I see where you’re coming from,” or, “Oh, that’s really interesting — let me think about that” before walking away will make your life a whole lot easier (and a lot less dramatic).
10. Change Your Perspective Of Them.
Changing how you see negative people can also help in a weird way. Instead of seeing them as a source of stress or annoyance, try to view them as an opportunity to practice your patience and empathy. I know that’s a bit woo-woo, but I’m all about self-improvement. By trying to see the good in people (or even the learning opportunity they present), you inevitably boost your emotional intelligence, and that’s what’s up.
11. Don’t Forget Your Own Mental Health.
Dealing with constant negativity can take a toll on your mental health, and given how much strain already put on it by the world sucking in general, you don’t need to add anything to it. Do whatever you have to do to make sure you stay in a good place. Maybe you go old school and do meditation and yoga, and that’s cool. Maybe you like boxing or running, or maybe you journal or paint. Whatever it is that re-centers you and makes you feel a little less crazy, make that a priority.
12. Remember that as much as it sucks, you can’t control people.
It’s important to remember that you can’t control how other people feel or act, only how you react to them. Trying to change a negative person’s outlook is a waste of time and will only leave you feeling frustrated and drained. Focus on managing your own reactions and protect your own energy. Accept that this is their issue to address, and concentrate on what you can control, which is your own thoughts and responses.
