How To Get A Guy Back That Pushed You Away

Things were going so well and you were so close but then all of a sudden, your partner started pushing you away for seemingly no reason. He barely wants to hang out and when you do, he gives you one-word answers. He never tells you much of what he’s thinking or even what’s going on in his life and you’re not sure how much longer you can cope. Here’s how to get a guy back that pushed you away so you can continue as a happy couple.

  1. Understand what made him push you away in the first place. If you want to get a guy back who pushed you away, it’s important to figure out what made him back off to begin with. Did you do something that upset him that he hasn’t been able to get over? Are you ready to move to the next phase in the relationship and he’s having commitment issues? Is he stressed about something else in his life like family drama, work pressure, or something else? Getting to the root of his behavior is the first step in getting things back on track.
  2. Busy yourself with the rest of your life. This guy pushed you away, fine. That doesn’t mean life stops until he comes to his senses. Instead of focusing all your energy on how to get him back, a better use of your time and energy would be to rejig things a bit and dive into the rest of your life. Work on advancing your career, prioritize spending time with your girls, spend some valuable time with your family, try out a new hobby… there are plenty of other things in life besides your relationship, and the happier you are in that way, the more this guy is likely to take notice.
  3. Confront him about his distant behavior. Sometimes communication is the best way forward. If he’s being distant or keeping you at arm’s length, ask him about it. Don’t go in all guns blazing and start throwing accusations or ultimatums at him, but do let him know how his behavior makes you feel and that you’d like answers for why he’s acting this way and how it can be resolved. That may be enough to get things navigating back towards the right track.
  4. Create a real fear of loss in him. He’s acting distant but he actually hasn’t ended your relationship, which most likely means he’s not totally done with it. However, it doesn’t mean you have to put up with him being awkward. Sometimes the best way to get a guy back who’s pushed you away is to make him realize what he’s missing. If he thinks that you may be the one to break things off and move on, it might snap him back into reality a bit.
  5. Give him some space. At the end of the day, there’s no use forcing yourself on someone who’s just not interested. If you know there’s a legitimate reason for his weird behavior, give him a bit of space to feel and process his feelings without pressuring him too much. You’ll know when you’ve had enough, but hopefully he’ll be back before you get to that point.
Jennifer Still is a writer and editor with more than 10 years of experience. The managing editor of Bolde, she has bylines in Vanity Fair, Business Insider, The New York Times, Glamour, Bon Appetit, and many more. You can follow her on Twitter @jenniferlstill
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