How To Handle That Girl Who Won’t Stop Flirting With Your Boyfriend

How To Handle That Girl Who Won’t Stop Flirting With Your Boyfriend ©iStock/svetikd

So you’ve got a great guy, and it seems like you’re not the only girl who knows it. For some reason, there’s this one chick who thinks it’s cool to incessantly flirt with your man even though she totally knows he’s in a relationship. Ugh. You trust him, but sometimes you want to smack her and tell her to back off before you go nuts on her ass. Here’s how to handle the girl that doesn’t understand the words “he’s taken.”

  1. Think before acting. Are they really flirting, or are they just talking? Is this is a stranger at the coffee shop, a neighbor, or a friend’s girlfriend? You don’t want to let inappropriate behavior slide, but you also don’t want to assume the worst for no reason.
  2. Calmly tell her to stop. What? Say what you’re actually feeling? Shocking, but it can work. Sometimes just the act of letting a girl know that you see what’s going on is enough to scare her away.
  3. Talk to your boyfriend. We’re quick to assume that the ladies are at fault, but maybe their friendly relationship goes both ways or was even initiated by him, and they could both cool down a bit on the buddy-buddy stuff.
  4. Don’t try to make him jealous. When he’s deep in a conversation with another woman, you might be tempted to make him jealous by chatting up another nearby cutie, but this generally just leads to more unnecessary drama and doesn’t really deal with the issues at hand.
  5. Offer to set her up with someone. If she’s a friend in your social circle and won’t be going away anytime soon, offer to set her up with someone.  Best case scenario is that you can actually hook her up with someone that will keep her busy for a while. Worst case scenario is that it’ll give her the clue that your guy isn’t an option.
  6. Stay confident. If you have the urge to run away and hide when a girl starts chatting up your guy, it’s not going to give the impression that you’re confident in the relationship. If someone is truly after him, it’s those soft spots that will give them ammunition. Stay strong and she won’t see as many ways in.
  7. Don’t cuss her out. Lingering emotions have a way of bubbling over, but this can come off as a little aggressive if nothing is actually going on. I once had a girl tell me to “stay the away” from her boyfriend, who was a platonic friend, when I was actually interested in his friend. You never know.
  8. Be assertive. When you figure out the right way to handle it, do it. Standing up for yourself and your relationship commands the respect that you deserve from him and everyone else in the world.
  9. Realize that whatever she’s hoping to achieve will never happen. If you trust him completely, then it really doesn’t matter how many women find him appealing. If anything, it can feel sort of like a compliment, because you obviously snagged a good one. Don’t let jealousy rear its head when good old pride is a better emotion to reach for.
Kate Ferguson is a Los Angeles local and freelance writer for a variety of blog and magazine genres. When she's not writing, the UC Davis graduate is focused on pursuits of the entertainment industry, spin class, and hot sauce. Look for article links, updates, (and the occasional joke) on Twitter @KateFerg or @WriterKateFerg, or check out her personal blog