Everything is going so well with this guy and you’re seriously starting to see a future with him. Then, boom! He disappears from your life out of nowhere and never talks to you again. When you get ghosted, it leaves you feeling angry, resentful, and worst of all, heartbroken. Even so, it is possible to make the best of a bad situation. Here are some ways to make a guy regret ghosting you.

Cast the blame where it belongs. It’s natural to wonder if something you did or said, or something about you led to it. You might think you weren’t good enough. But the truth is, it isn’t about you. It’s all on him, the dumper who’s unable to have adult conversations. The first step to getting better is to stop making excuses for him. Putting yourself down with guilt never helps.

Don’t chase after him. You may obsess about finding closure, but it’s best to accept that you might never know why he left. So, if he hasn’t responded to your messages or calls, don’t continue to send messages or call endlessly. The last thing you want is to come across as desperate, needy, or weak.

Change your perspective. A failed relationship is also a successful one because you triumphantly dodged a bullet. Even though being ghosted is a hard pill to swallow, you should start to think that maybe your ghost boyfriend did you a favor. No longer do you have to deal with him. Think of it as a chance to learn and grow, and seize it.

Purge him from your life and your thoughts. The hardest part of dealing with ghosting is how to stop thinking about him and grow from the situation. To block him off,  begin to act like he never existed. Deleting his number makes you less inclined to call him. Or better still, literally block him off on social media and anywhere there are traces of him. Also, get rid of anything that serves as a reminder of him.

Don’t let him know he’s gotten to you. Try not to get visibly angry or ask questions about his ghosting. This is a psychology game. He probably left you to see how you would react. If this is the case, being angry will give him satisfaction. It’s time to burst his bubble. Be polite toward him if you ever see him again, and definitely don’t send him drunk texts about what a jerk he is.

More ways to make a guy regret ghosting you

Ignore him. Sometimes ghosters may try to resurface subtly by liking your posts, sending a text, or commenting on your posts, among other things. Act like you didn’t see this if it happens. Don’t let his renewed attention sweep you off your feet or get to you. Give him a taste of his own medicine. Make it clear to him by your actions that you are too busy to notice.

Show him what he’s missing. Just because he left doesn’t mean you can’t be happy or your life has come to a halt. Let him understand that you are moving on fine by sharing happy pictures of yourself on your status. Yeah, you may have blocked him already, but sometimes ghosters find a way around these things to keep tabs on you. Or, who knows, he could hear from a little bird. So make him aware that you are happy and still beautiful nonetheless.

Do what you love. Spend time engaging in hobbies and pastimes you enjoy. Relationships are a time sapper, but now that you’re single again, you have more time on your hands to go back to what you’ve always loved doing. If there’s something you’ve been wanting to learn, now’s the perfect time to get to it!

Go on dates. It’s not too early to begin dating. Is there a guy lurking in the shadows who’s been waiting for the right moment to take you out for lunch? It’s time to finally say yes to him. Don’t allow your previous experience to get in the way of things. Besides, it’s not a bad idea to make your ex feel jealous. This shouldn’t be your sole reason for going out with someone new, though. If you ever go out on a date, do it for you.

Don’t drop your standards. Healthy relationships are built on clear boundaries. If you’ve already set good limits, play by your rules. Now’s not the time to lower them. Not for him, and not anyone else. Always prioritize what is most essential to you and do what is best for you.

Practice mindfulness. Regardless of how much it sucks, you’re definitely not alone when it comes to being ghosted. Anywhere between 13–23% of the people living in the U.S. have experienced ghosting, according to research. It’s definitely not worth it to waste emotions on someone who just disappeared like a fart in the wind. Mindfulness can help you control your feelings and lessen stress, anxiety, and depression. Take time to build resilience and, most importantly, keep your eye on your goals.

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