Saying breakups are tough is an understatement. If you just had your heart shattered, you’re probably wondering, what now? Don’t worry — I’ve got you covered. Follow these 8 tips for making moving on smooth sailing (or at least a little smoother than it would have been otherwise):
- You need to wallow. Some women want to avoid this stage altogether, but it can be one of the most important. Wallowing doesn’t make you weak; it makes you compassionate. You’re allowing yourself time to grieve your former relationship so that you can eventually find the strength to move on.
- Forget the revenge. If he wronged you, the only way to heal is to give up the anger and move on. The thrill of burning his things, spreading vicious rumors, and hooking up with his bestie only lasts so long. In the end, you’ll be left bitter with your wounds still open.
- Forget his friendship. If you jump immediately into the friend zone with your ex, you’re not giving yourself the space and the time to move on. Your ex may be pushing for a friendship, but you need to do what’s best for you, and at this point the more space, the better.
- Remove the memories. Photographs, presents, text messages, and mementos should be put in your past, along with the relationship. If your place is infested with reminders of him, then pack them up so you can let it go.
- Return his stuff. Most likely he’s left stuff at your place and vice versa. Holding his stuff hostage is childish. Not only will you get your own stuff back, but you’re also physically removing what’s left of him from your home.
- Unfollow his social media. Seeing pictures of him out having fun is only going to hurt you. Obsessing over every status update only keeps you from moving forward. Whatever he’s doing no longer affects what you’re doing, so there’s no need to keep tabs on him anymore.
- Invest in friends and family. When you just got dumped, it’s easy to feel alone and unloved. Remember the people who have always been there. Your family and friends are the ones that will truly get you through this rough patch.
- Have fun without a man. You need to get out, but you don’t have to get back out on the market just yet. If you’re not ready for the next wave to hit your heart, then don’t rush it. That doesn’t mean you have to be a shut in — get out, and have some fun with your girls. Make the night about you and not the quest for a new man.
No one ever said breaking up was easy. t’s pretty crappy, but trust me, you’ll get through it — especially if you make it your mission from day one to move on. Staying stuck on what was keeps you from what could be. So save yourself the lingering heartbreak and you’ll sail away to happiness in no time.
