So many of us who want to find love always end up coming up short. We put our best foot forward to show a guy that we’re fully capable of being an amazing girlfriend and partner in life, only to be treated like crap and have our kindness taken advantage of. Enough is enough. If the guy you’re dating wants boyfriend perks, he needs to earn them first. Don’t accept anything less.
- You deserve a guy who rises to the occasion. You absolutely deserve to have a guy in your life who works and makes a real effort to show you he cares about you, and you shouldn’t accept anything less. If he doesn’t come to the door to pick you up, he sure as hell doesn’t deserve to be invited through that same door later on. Let him work for it. Let him man up.
- If he really likes you, he won’t be shy about showing it. When a guy gives a genuine sh*t about you, nothing will stop him from showing it, period. If you give a guy too much leeway, he’s never going to pull up the slack. Be hard. Be tough to impress. Be the girl he needs to earn.
- You’ll weed out the a-holes much sooner. When you set the bar higher, the guys who are actually worth your investment will rise to meet the standard. The guys who don’t stick around are merely the hookup buddies that you wouldn’t want wasting your time in the first place. It’s a blessing to weed out the idiots by raising the bar to be with you. You’re a privilege, not an option.
- It’s not a game — it’s just called having high standards. There’s a clear difference between playing games with guys to bait their interest and having high standards in the ways which you deserve to be treated. Wanting a guy to show you gentlemanly respect and courtesy while being demonstrative about how he feels about you is nothing to shy away from. You should never feel badly for wanting a relationship with someone who truly makes you feel amazing on all levels.
- This lazy BS is unacceptable. Cooking a guy dinner or sleeping with him before he’s done anything real and genuine for you is complete garbage — you don’t owe him anything. Before you start handing over wifey benefits, examine what he’s done for you lately. Pro tip: stop analyzing his words. Any guy can whisper sweet nothings, but it takes a genuinely interested man to show you he cares with actual action.
- You shouldn’t be working harder than he is. It’s natural to want to exhibit your awesome girlfriend qualities to the new guy in your life, but before you do that, remind yourself to stay on his level. You shouldn’t be making more effort than he’s made — that’s how amazing women are taken for granted. Instead, go with the flow of things and maintain a mutual sense of relationship progression. Don’t work overtime for someone who isn’t giving 100%.
- Observing who he is first will benefit you in the long run. If you take the time to sit back, enjoy the beginning stages and observe who he carefully instead of rushing in head-first, you’ll find you actually notice more about who he really is than you would have if you were too busy trying to impress him. You’ll have the time to notice if he’s a complete jerk or a dream come true. Remember, only fools rush in. Stay the course!
- You have the right to your own happiness. You know that your goal is happiness for yourself, so don’t lose sight of that goal by getting wrapped up in the notion that you need to blow him away with your fabulous self. The right guy isn’t going to need everything up front — he’ll take the time to get to know you and show his affection for you in a real way. The right guy already knows you’re fabulous and doesn’t mind waiting and proving his worth to earn the best parts of your heart of gold. He knows that if he wants boyfriend perks, he needs to earn them first.