As women, we spend a lot of time in life trying to figure men out. We don’t assume that they’re particularly complex, but they’re so non-expressive sometimes that it’s hard to get inside their heads. Thankfully, some kind men over on Reddit decided to share their biggest guy secrets to illuminate their gender a bit more. Here are some of the most popular answers.
1. His erections aren’t always about you.
As u/HelloJerry5A says: “If a guy can’t get or maintain an erection it has nothing to do with you and trying to make it about his attraction to you only makes it worse.” Given that his comment has nearly 12,000 upvotes, it seems this is a pretty popular guy secret.
2. Compliments matter.
Women love being told when we look good or when guys find us attractive, funny, smart, etc. However, we don’t often think of how much compliments matter to guys or how rare they are. “If you tell me I look good or compliment me, even in a completely nonflirty way, it will make my whole day,” writes u/KunckledeepinUrethra. This is another popular guy secret, given how many people expressed this same sentiment.
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4. Guys like it when women take control.
It’s 2022, but many women still subscribe to the belief that men should lead in relationships. Time to change it up! As u/Jopast22 reveals: “We secretly want girls to take the initiative more when it comes to showing affection. It shouldn’t always be on the guy.” The same comes for taking charge in the bedroom and other relationship areas.
5. They’re terrified of being thought of as “creepy.”
In women’s eyes, guys are such fiends that they’re constantly thinking about how to get it by any means necessary, right? Obviously not. They’re not even that crazy about it, insists u/PlsChickenMyNugget. “We don’t always think about sex, we don’t give a you know what. We don’t take hints because if we get the wrong idea we’re seen as creeps and get socially crucified,” he says.
6. Their testicles move on their own.
Women may not necessarily think about guys’ balls on a daily basis, but it’s kind of a fun fact/guys secret that they’re always moving. “Our testicles move around slowly all the time. We don’t feel it or control it, they just do their thing,” shares u/jimmywhiskers. “When my ex discovered this she stared at them and related the movement to a lava lamp.”
7. They actually like cuddling.
Women often assume that men just want to hop into bed and be done with it, but u/SockByte insists that’s not true and that men also enjoy cuddling. Not only that, but sometimes, they even want to be the little spoon. Worth keeping in mind!
8. Guys get sad sometimes too.
While men aren’t necessarily encouraged to show their emotions outwardly, u/The_Real_Evil_Morty reveals that “we’re all secretly a little sad a lot of the time.” We should always keep in mind that just because someone doesn’t express their pain doesn’t mean they don’t have it.
9. They apparently fake it too.
We know women fake orgasms – you’ve probably done it yourself now and again – but u/varnell_hill claims that men do as well. This sounds a bit logistically challenging given that, you know, they’d need unscented shampoo (his suggestion) to be very convincing. However, perhaps more aptly, u/king_of_all_blacks says that “Just because I finished doesn’t mean I enjoyed it.”
10. Sometimes they do think we look fat in that dress.
However, u/how_about_tuesday points out that men can never really be honest with women about this when they ask, so why bother? One woman did respond to him suggesting that men simply say that perhaps what we’re wearing isn’t the most flattering (but only when asked).
11. Sometimes guys aren’t thinking about anything at all.
Because women’s minds are so busy, we often assume that guys must be deep in thought when they’re quiet/distracted. U/AmielJohn says that’s definitely not true. “Sometimes when we look like we are in deep thought. We are probably thinking of something so simple/silly,” he shares. “Last night my wife looked worried because I had a deadpan look and just sitting. She asked me what I’m thinking about and I replied back to her, ‘Would chainmail armor be effective against zombies?’ She looked relieved and annoyed at the same time.”
12. It doesn’t take a lot to make them happy.
Women often obsess over trying to figure out the way to a man’s heart, but it’s actually pretty simple. As u/Altaira99 says: “Full belly, empty testicles.” I think you get it.
13. They hate when you take their food.
This may not be a massive guy secret in so much as it is a pet peeve. U/ShRek_toEz speaks for many men when he says: “I don’t necessarily enjoy my food being taken off my plate when we are eating out. Might be fine the first to second time, not so much the third or fourth.” Ladies, we have to start ordering our own fries.