Everyone goes through tough times in life, but sadly, men are far less likely to reach out when they need help. Men are statistically far less likely to seek therapy or other interventions when they’re struggling, and a whopping 40% of men refuse to discuss their mental health at all. As a result, when they get in a bad spot but simply can’t admit it, they tend to show it in these ways.
1. Overcompensation
Guys who are struggling often act like they’ve got everything under control even when they don’t. They might overcompensate by talking big or showing off. But remember, the loudest one in the room is often the most insecure. Many men need to learn that it’s okay to let their guard down and admit vulnerability.
2. Avoiding Serious Conversations
If a guy avoids deep conversations or changes the subject when things get serious, he might be battling some inner demons. It’s easier to stick to small talk than admit something’s up. If only they realized that opening up can be a huge relief and the first step to feeling better.
3. Isolation
Struggling guys often pull away from friends and family. It’s not that they don’t care, they just don’t want to burden people or admit they’re having a tough time. Yet, leaning on loved ones in tough times is what they’re there for. Instead, they tend to spend a lot of time alone and shut down even further, which only exacerbates the problem.
4. Workaholism
Burying themselves in work can be a way of avoiding personal problems. If a guy is always at the office or glued to his laptop, he might be struggling with something and looking to distract himself to keep from thinking about it too much. Balance is key, and all work and no play is a recipe for burnout. Plus, avoiding problems only makes them snowball and hit you even harder when they can no longer be avoided.
5. Excessive Bravado
If a guy constantly needs to prove how tough or macho he is, he might be compensating for inner struggles. Real strength isn’t about showing off, but about being honest with yourself. True bravery is admitting when you’re not okay. While society is making strides in attempting to dismantle toxic masculinity, many of its customs are pretty deeply ingrained in men.
6. Irritability
Men who are struggling often have a short fuse. If he’s quick to anger or gets irritated over small things, he might be dealing with some pressures or issues he hasn’t shared with anyone else. While everyone has bad days, if his are seemingly endless and only getting worse, it’s clear there’s something deeper happening there that needs to be confronted.
7. Neglecting Self-Care
If he’s neglecting his health, skipping meals, or not getting enough sleep, it might be a sign he’s overwhelmed. Self-care often takes a backseat when we’re dealing with tough stuff, but taking care of yourself is the foundation of dealing with life’s challenges.
8. Overusing Humor
Constant joking and clowning around can be a way of hiding pain. If he’s always the life of the party but never opens up, he might be struggling more than he lets on. He doesn’t realize that it’s okay to stop playing the court jester and actually have a serious conversation. In fact, his laughter might be more genuine if he was able to offload some of the pain and stress he’s feeling.
9. Excessive Control
Guys who are struggling might try to control everything around them. It’s a way of compensating for the chaos they feel inside. Of course, what he doesn’t realize is that there’s a lot in life that’s out of our hands and there’s no way he can control the outcome of every possible situation.
10. Overindulgence
Excessive drinking, eating, or partying can be signs of inner turmoil. These are often ways to numb the pain or escape from reality, but these quick fixes often lead to bigger problems down the road.
11. Avoiding Commitment
If he’s always non-committal or vague about his plans, he might be dealing with uncertainty in his life. It’s easier to stay unattached than to risk failure or disappointment. Of course, in doing this, he avoids taking risks and misses out on some of the amazing opportunities for success and growth that doing so can provide.
12. Constant Busyness
If he’s always on the go and never takes time to relax, he might be running from something. Constant busyness can be a way of avoiding feelings or thoughts that are hard to face. The more he’s on the go, the less time he has to sit around and ruminate on his problems.
13. Sudden Personality Changes
Sudden changes in behavior, interests, or appearance can be signs of inner struggle. People often try to change their external circumstances when they can’t deal with what’s going on inside, but that’s only a band-aid — it doesn’t heal the actual wounds inside.
14. Becoming Overly Competitive
Guys who are always trying to outdo everyone else might be battling insecurities. Winning becomes a way of proving to themselves that they’re okay. However, all the victories they achieve are hollow and don’t do anything to alleviate the way they’re feeling inside.
15. Rarely Asking for Help
If he never asks for help, even when he clearly needs it, he might be too proud to admit he’s struggling. Asking for help can feel like admitting defeat, but it’s really a sign of strength. He wouldn’t think twice about coming to the aid of the people he cares about, but for some reason, he can’t accept help himself.
16. Always Playing the Hero
If he’s always trying to rescue other people, he might be doing so as a way of avoiding his own problems. It’s easier to fix someone else’s life than to admit that our own is a mess. But remember, sometimes the hero needs saving too.
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