An Open Letter To Everyone Who Hassles Me About My Interracial Relationship

An Open Letter To Everyone Who Hassles Me About My Interracial Relationship ©iStock/Alija

Dating is hard on a good day, but it gets even harder when you’re in an interracial relationship. Everyone seems to have an opinion and they want you to know about it, even though it’s none of their business. After all, our lives are our own and we should be able to date who we want to date. Here’s what I want to say to everyone who’s hassled me about my relationship:

  1. Screw you. It’s my life and I’ll date whomever I want, whenever I want. I’m not as shallow and empty as you and I determine people’s worth by their entire person, not the color of their skin. Who made you king/queen anyway?
  2. Grow up! Your lack of maturity becomes obvious when you give me a hard time for being in an interracial relationship. Children pick on one another for physical appearance, not adults. I feel sorry that your life is so empty you feel the need to pick mine apart.
  3. I’m sorry. I’m sorry you’re such a terrible person that you cannot see past skin color and identify us as two people who enjoy being with one another. I’m sorry you haven’t found someone who makes you feel the way he makes me feel. Given your behavior towards me, you probably don’t deserve it.
  4. Get with the times. It’s unacceptable to automatically discount someone because of their race or ethnicity. People actually have merit beyond their appearance — shocking, I know! — and racism is not an attractive quality. He’s a great guy and you missed out on getting to know someone awesome.
  5. Rethink your life philosophy. Did it ever occur to you that you’re the one in the wrong and not me? Love isn’t determined by physical appearance, and it’s sad that you thought it appropriate to suggest as much. It’s time for you to rethink the way you approach life, especially the immense focus you have on other people’s! I bet you’d be a less miserable person if you diverted your attention to more positive ventures.
  6. Mind your own damn business. Nobody likes a busybody and a crap talker, but you’re both. Didn’t your mother ever tell you to worry about you, and only you? If she didn’t, she sure should have! You’re the kind of person that tries to make themselves feel better by putting others down. Shame on you for thinking that’s OK.
  7. Learn to see the beauty in all things. Everything has beauty and merit, and just because you don’t think he and I belong together doesn’t mean we don’t find one another beautiful. If we all found the same things attractive, the world would be an awful and boring place. Can you not appreciate that people have different tastes? Did you grow up under a rock?
  8. Thank you. Thank you for reminding me that you don’t need a million people in your life, you only need a few good people who care about you and don’t judge needlessly. I’m glad you put this into perspective for me and I’m glad you gave me a good reason to remove you from my life. There is no room for this kind of ugliness in the pursuit of happiness.
C. is an aspiring yogi and Ph.D student who loves her dogs, bright lipstick and to travel. Find her on IG @drparko121314