Dear Former Friend With Benefits,
We had a lot of good times back in the day, despite what people may say. I’ve never been sorry that we were just friends who had sex, and I hope that you aren’t, either. Women always make it sound like guys are using them, but really I used you in the best possible. You were always there when I wanted you, gone when I didn’t, and you were exactly what I needed at the time. Here’s what I want to thank you for:
- Being the perfect in-between. During those times in my life when neither a booty call or boyfriend would do, you were there. Thank you for being a great bedtime playmate and taking care of my needs in the sack.
- Being more than a hookup buddy. Because we were friends too, you treated me with way more respect than a total hookup buddy, and you didn’t make me feel bad about myself for being OK with hooking up with a guy I wasn’t dating. Basically, you rock.
- Being able to separate our friendship from our sex life. Around the crew, you still managed to treat me like one of the gang and not the one you were banging. I appreciate the lack of awkwardness and for not bringing up our sex life to our friends (at least not in front of me).
- Occasionally going on dates. Although they weren’t romantic, grabbing pizza or seeing a movie because we were bored after sex was fun and made me feel like I mattered for more than just sex. This did wonders for my self-esteem and made me feel like more than a piece of ass.
- Being cool when we cut it off. No one likes a stage-5 clinger, and you exited our good times with style and grace. You didn’t call a hundred times, you rarely texted me for a booty call, and you weren’t a crazy, jealous jack-ass like many an ex-boyfriend has been.
- Staying friends with me after the fact. It can be hard to be friends with someone you got down with, but our friendship stayed intact and that’s awesome.
- Reminding me how awesome I am after breakups with actual boyfriends. Whenever I felt like I wasn’t good enough, you were always there with a shoulder to cry on… and a bed to crawl in… and a hard on.
- Not judging me for drunk texts or phone calls looking for sex. Because you were doing it too, you never judged me or gave me a hard time.
- Being honest. You didn’t want a relationship and that’s cool, because neither did I. You were honest about that, though, and it was refreshing.
