People Who Lack Emotional Intelligence Often Make These 11 Social Faux Pas

People Who Lack Emotional Intelligence Often Make These 11 Social Faux Pas

Social intelligence is key to navigating your interactions with people smoothly, but not everyone has it down pat. Often, those lacking in this area tend to stumble into social faux pas, unwittingly creating awkwardness or misunderstandings. Below are some of the most common missteps made by people who might be struggling in this department — you’ll probably recognize more than a few in people you know, or maybe even in yourself.

1. Making insensitive remarks

People with low emotional intelligence often blurt out things without considering how they might affect other people. It’s like they don’t have a filter between their brain and their mouth. They might make a joke that’s actually hurtful or say something offensive without realizing it. The problem is, they often don’t see the impact of their words, leaving people feeling upset or disrespected. It’s important to think before you speak and consider how your words might come across to someone with different experiences or sensitivities.

2. Not being able to read people (or the room)

Reading the room isn’t everyone’s strong suit, but for those lacking in emotional intelligence, it’s particularly challenging. They might not pick up on subtle cues like body language or tone of voice, which can lead to miscommunications or awkward situations. For example, they might not notice when someone is uninterested or uncomfortable in a conversation. This lack of awareness can make social interactions tricky and can sometimes lead to misunderstandings or hurt feelings.

3. Want a partner? Attract love with the power of your mind.

Sweetn is a new research-based startup that shows you how to call love into your life with the power of your mind. Take our quiz, and try our tools—they can transform your energy and your love life in a few weeks. Just click here.

4. Lacking empathy

Empathy is about understanding and sharing other people’s feelings, but for some, this doesn’t come naturally. They might struggle to see things from another person’s perspective or to understand why someone feels a certain way. This can make them seem cold or uncaring, even if that’s not their intention. Being empathetic doesn’t mean you have to agree with someone else’s feelings; it’s just about acknowledging and respecting them.

5. Inability to Handle Criticism

Taking criticism is hard, but people with low emotional intelligence often take it particularly badly. Instead of seeing it as constructive feedback, they might get defensive or upset. They could take it as a personal attack, missing an opportunity for growth or improvement. Constructive criticism is a part of life, and being able to take it on board, even if it stings a bit, is a necessary evil if you want to grow as a person.

6. Not really listening to people

When someone’s not truly listening, it’s not just rude; it’s a classic social faux pas. This happens when people are more focused on what they want to say next rather than paying attention to what’s being said. It’s like they’re hearing the words but not absorbing the meaning. This can lead to misunderstandings and make the other person feel undervalued. Active listening, where you really engage with what’s being said, is crucial in any conversation. It shows respect and interest in the other person’s thoughts and feelings.

7. Impulsiveness

Acting without thinking can be a major social misstep. Impulsive behaviors, like interrupting people or making snap decisions without considering the consequences, can disrupt social harmony. It might come off as selfish or inconsiderate. Taking a moment to pause and think before acting or speaking can save a lot of awkward situations and help maintain positive relationships with those around you.

8. Inability to Manage their emotions

People who struggle with emotional regulation often find themselves in uncomfortable social situations. If someone can’t keep their emotions in check, they might overreact to a minor issue or get too angry in a calm discussion. It’s important to understand and manage your emotions, especially in social settings. Recognizing when you’re starting to feel overwhelmed and finding ways to calm down before reacting can help avoid many social faux pas.

9. Difficulty Recognizing Social Cues

Missing social cues is a common mistake for those lacking emotional intelligence. This could mean not realizing when it’s time to stop talking, or not picking up on someone’s discomfort in a conversation. Being able to read these cues is key to smooth social interactions. It helps to be observant and to pay attention to non-verbal signals, like body language and facial expressions, as they can tell you a lot about how someone is feeling.

10. Lacking Conflict Resolution Skills

People who can’t handle conflicts effectively often find themselves in messy social situations. Instead of finding a middle ground, they might avoid the issue, become overly aggressive, or hold grudges. This inability to navigate disagreements in a healthy way can strain relationships. Good conflict resolution involves being able to listen, staying calm, and working towards a solution that respects everyone involved. It’s about finding a balance between standing up for yourself and considering other people’s viewpoints.

11. Self-Centeredness

Being self-centered is a significant social faux pas. It’s when someone always makes the conversation about themselves or fails to show interest in other people. This can leave people around them feeling overlooked and unimportant. It’s crucial in social interactions to share the spotlight and show genuine interest in people’s lives and feelings. Conversations are a two-way street, and recognizing that everyone has a story to tell is key to avoiding this faux pas.

12. Inconsistent Communication

Inconsistent communication can be confusing and frustrating for people. If someone is warm and chatty one day but cold and distant the next, it sends mixed signals. This inconsistency makes it hard for people to build trust and understand where they stand. Clear and consistent communication is vital in maintaining healthy relationships. It’s about being reliable in how you interact with people and making sure your words match your actions.

Originally from Australia, Emma Mills graduated from the University of Queensland with a dual degree in Philosophy and Applied Linguistics before moving to Los Angeles to become a professional matchmaker (a bit of a shift, obviously). Since 2015, she has helped more than 150 people find lasting love and remains passionate about bringing amazing singletons together.

Emma is also the author of the upcoming Hachette publication, "Off the Beaten Track: Finding Lasting Love in the Least Likely of Places," due out in January 2025.