Reminder: Being Attractive Is Not Your Job

Sure, getting dolled up is fun for some and I would never insult anyone who truly enjoyed glamming as a hobby. I personally love it, but I can’t stand when people act like I’m being weird or gross for stepping out of my house in my natural “I woke up like this” state. The world expects you to have a certain level of hygiene, but aside from that, you’re not actually required to put any additional effort into your appearance. Being attractive is not your job, and no one should make you feel less than for leaving your house with no makeup and a fun bun.

  1. Always looking your best is exhausting. Being constantly prepared for brutal judgments is emotionally and physically exhausting. You have the right to spend your energy elsewhere if you choose and not have your appearance harshly criticized. If people won’t stop judging, you always have the option to not care what they think of you, and use your new-found extra energy on something else.
  2. You don’t need any unnecessary stress. Life is so hard to begin with! You’re stressed enough, so you seriously don’t need the pressure of trying to look your “best” all the time. Removing this ridiculous standard is like crossing something off your already massively overbooked to do list.
  3. Your value isn’t determined by your appearance. And that’s a good thing — I’d hate to live in a world where I could buy my value as a human being at Sephora. There are many more important things than how you look, like what you have to say, for example. Give yourself a break on judging your looks, because one singular characteristic cannot possibly define you as a person.
  4. You have more interesting and important things to tackle. I think if I did everything my hairstylist, dermatologist, and makeup rep told me to do on a regular basis, I’d never leave the bathroom or get anything meaningful done.
  5. The bar for being “attractive” is constantly being set higher. Makeup routines are getting more advanced and time consuming, elective surgery is a common place occurrence, we aim to compete with women that have been Photoshopped and filtered, and these days everyone’s expected to be a rock star at the gym. How can anyone keep up?
  6. You deserve a break. There’s always something to do or buy. There are constantly new product launches and new techniques to learn, trendier hairstyles, more effective workout routines, and fast fashion has ensured your wardrobe is obsolete every 6 weeks. You can never just settle into a routine as you’re constantly chasing the new “It” thing in the beauty and fashion industries.
  7. Rating women in public is childish. If anyone gives you a poor score for not being all done up, they’re an idiot. Don’t let a childish moron hurt your feelings or make you feel embarrassed to be seen in the world.
  8. You’re not a prisoner in your own bathroom. You really don’t have to stay in there until you look like a Kardashian. Just walk out the front door!
  9. Constantly investing in your appearance is super expensive. Hair salon and products, dermatologist and skin care, makeup, nails, tanning, gym membership, waxes, facials, teeth whitening, the list goes on and on. Bye bye, paycheck.
  10. You should feel comfortable in your natural state. We might not feel our best how we naturally are, but at the very least, we should be able to feel comfortable. And we definitely shouldn’t feel like we’re trapped in our own homes until we change.
  11. You’ll ruin the fun of glamming by making it a mandatory activity in your life. They say the fastest way to ruin a hobby is to make it your job, and being pretty doesn’t even come with a paycheck.
  12. The gym will become your hell. You don’t need to have a smoking hot body year round. Trying to live up to a ridiculous body image standard will make the gym a chore instead of a fun experience. Health is important, but don’t let it become an obsession.
  13. The more effort you put into your appearance, the higher you’re setting the standard. In your chase for perfection, you’ll end up just adding more and more things to your beauty routine until it eats up your entire day. You’ll get so used to your high maintenance look that you won’t feel good about yourself if you only have about an hour to get ready.
  14. Makeup is always a choice. You can choose to wear it, skip it, or make every bold or artistic makeup choice that men generally hate. Wear blue lipstick and dump glitter on your face if you feel like it. Makeup exists so you can express yourself, not so you can fit a mold.
  15. You have a real job. You know, that one you did all that schooling for and pays all your bills?
  16. Being attractive is actually someone else’s job, they get PAID for it. Models and Internet beauty gurus get beaucoup bucks for all their efforts. Why should you work that hard for free?
  17. Men don’t have the live up to the same standards. If they can put on a hat and roll out, so can I.
  18. It’s never OK for a stranger to insult your looks. Or anyone, actually. If someone has a problem with how you’re presenting yourself in public, maybe they should just go home and stare at the Instagram feed, where everyone is always at their best.
  19. Women have enough on their plates. Sexism, unequal pay, birth control, glass ceilings… AND I’m supposed to contour every friggin’ day?
  20. You have a right to be ANYWHERE au naturale. Never let anyone make you feel like you’re less deserving of a spot in public than a girl who’s dolled up to be super hott that night. You both have a right to be there and have a good time.
  21. Judgey people are the worst. It’s OK to not let these people’s opinions of you affect your actions or morning/going out routine.
  22. It’s normal to be hungry. Go ahead and eat a doughnut. You’re not actually required to deprive yourself constantly to try to achieve a perfect body. Don’t let anyone shame you for having normal functioning body that requires sustenance and occasionally craves junk food. Most likely, being thin is not part of your job description and a desire to be skinny shouldn’t be a factor in your decision making process.
  23. People who ask if you’re tired or sick are just being rude. Seriously, can we all agree to stop doing this right now? About 90% of the reason women wear make up every day is to avoid people asking them if they’re sick or tired. Sorry loser, that’s just the way my face looks.
Holly Harris is a freelance writer, full time student, and mommy to a toddler sass monster. In her (nearly nonexistent) free time, you can find her lifting something heavy in her home gym or chugging vodka sodas with friends. She contributes to several other sites, including Elite Daily.