Reminder: Someone Who Loves You Won’t Risk Losing You

When your partner betrays you, there’s no worse feeling. This is the person you trust, the one person who’s supposed to never hurt you, so when it happens, it can be incredibly devastating. Sure, they might say they’re sorry, but should you forgive them? Do they really love you like they say they do? Before you decide to move forward with your relationship, it’s important to remember that someone who loves you wouldn’t risk losing you.

  1. If they’re willing to put you on the line, they don’t value you. This really is the bottom line. How on earth can your partner care about you and your well-being or your relationship as a whole if they were willing to risk losing you by betraying you? Whether they cheated, lied to you about something major, or whatever else happened, these aren’t simple “mistakes.” These are behaviors they knew would hurt you and possibly destroy your relationship and they did it anyway. How can you trust someone like that?
  2. Someone who loves you will do everything they can to keep you. A partner who wants to be with you long-term will act accordingly. They’ll appreciate you, respect you, treat you with courtesy and consideration, and model their behavior in a way that honors that. That’s not to say that you should be the center of their world, but if they’re doing things that mean they risk losing you, are they really all that bothered?
  3. Respect is a huge component of love. You cannot have a happy, healthy relationship with someone without respect. How do you respect someone? You treat them with kindness. You don’t badmouth them, lie to them, or do things that undermine them in any way. You express yourself honestly and openly and listen to how they feel in return. Anything else is a recipe for disaster. If your partner shows they don’t respect you by doing something to hurt you or betray you, you’re better off without them.
  4. Either they’re okay with betraying you or they don’t care if they’ll lose you – or both. There are two possibilities here for what could be going on in their head: either they betrayed you because they don’t think it’s a big deal and they’re fine with knowing that they’re screwing you over because they think you’ll put up with it anyway, or they don’t care if they risk losing you by doing whatever it is they’re doing because they don’t care if you’re gone. In this case, you don’t need to know what the answer is. It’s better you move on ASAP.
Bolde has been a source of dating and relationship advice for single women around the world since 2014. We combine scientific data, experiential wisdom, and personal anecdotes to provide help and encouragement to those frustrated by the journey to find love. Follow us on Instagram @bolde_media or on Facebook @BoldeMedia