You Can Send A Bag Of Gummy D*cks To Your Mortal Enemy Totally Anonymously

If there’s someone in your life who’s just a complete and total a-hole that you’d love to tell to eat a bag of d*cks, now you can… albeit in slightly less aggressive terms. Etsy seller ShipABagOfD*cks will do just that: ship a bag of gummy d*cks to your mortal enemy anonymously. This is a service we can all appreciate!

  1. Yes, it’s petty. That’s the whole point. Imagine the look on your enemy’s face when they open up a box they never ordered to find a bag of gummy d*cks and a message from someone telling them how much they suck… but they don’t know who. The feeling of utter joy that gives me cannot be described.
  2. For $7.19, this is a total steal. Is there really a price limit on serving such stone-cold justice? I don’t think so. But the seller offering to send “big, juicy, mouth-watering gummy d*cks” to someone you really can’t stand for only $7.19 isn’t just a bargain, it’s a total steal.
  3. Not that your enemy deserves something sweet… I consider candy to be one of life’s great pleasures, so the idea of sending someone I can’t stand something that’s actually kinda nice at its root (despite its rather rude shape) is a little annoying. However, I feel like the statement is big enough to overshadow the whole candy thing, so I’m still into it.
  4. This would be great to send to someone you like too. Maybe you have a friend who’s man mad and you know would love a big bag of gummy d*cks. Maybe you’re throwing a bachelorette party and think these would make a great party favor. It doesn’t have to be all negative in here. Gummy d*cks can be a force of good too!
Bolde has been a source of dating and relationship advice for single women around the world since 2014. We combine scientific data, experiential wisdom, and personal anecdotes to provide help and encouragement to those frustrated by the journey to find love. Follow us on Instagram @bolde_media or on Facebook @BoldeMedia
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