I Shouldn’t Have To Wonder What A Kiss Means

I Shouldn’t Have To Wonder What A Kiss Means ©iStock/AmmentorpDK

If you press your lips up against mine, then you owe me an explanation. Was it a kiss you’ve been dreaming about for years or was it a one time thing? Were you hoping it would lead to a hook-up or a relationship? Either way, you need to let me know. I shouldn’t have to wonder what a kiss means.

  1. I deserve to know where I stand with you. If a man asks me to “hang out,” I don’t know what he means. Even if he kisses me or has sex with me, I don’t know what it means. It’s not fair that I have to keep playing guessing games, even after we’ve shared intimate moments together.
  2. The confusion makes the moment less special. I can’t bask in happiness after our kiss, because I’ll be too busy wondering what the hell it meant. Instead of replaying the moment over and over in my mind before I go to bed at night, I’ll be texting all my friends to see if they can tell me what they think it meant.
  3. I don’t want to waste time on you. Our kiss either meant something or it didn’t. I don’t care either way. Just let me know, so I can figure out if I should go on that blind date my friend set up or cancel it.
  4. I shouldn’t have to ask you how you feel. I know the simple solution is to shoot you a text, asking if you’re interested in a serious relationship or if you’re only looking for a hookup, but I don’t want to do that. It’s embarrassing. I wish you’d just make it clear how you felt, so I didn’t have to jump through hoops in order to find out.
  5. There’s no reason to hide your intentions. It’s not like asking for a hookup is going to get you rejected, because sites like Tinder exists. With the swipe of a phone screen, you can find girls ready for a fling. You might as well be honest about what you want, so we can all end up with someone that’s on the same page as us.
  6. Feelings aren’t embarrassing. If you like me, please don’t play hard to get. Just tell me how you feel about me. Liking someone is something to be happy about, not ashamed of.
  7. I get attached easily. After I kiss you, it won’t be long until I develop deep feelings for you. If I don’t mean anything to you, then I want to know right away, so I can work on forgetting about you. Don’t build me up, only to knock me down.
  8. Intimate moments actually mean something to me. Some men don’t even think that sex means anything, so I can’t expect them to make a big deal out of a kiss. But to me, those moments matter. I just wish I could tell if they mattered to you, too.
  9. We can miss out on something great. If the kiss meant something to both of us, but we’re both assuming it meant nothing to the other person, then we’re never going to reach out to take the next step. Our lack of communication is killing us. That’s why most relationships never go anywhere.
Holly Riordan is a writer from Long Island, New York who has authored several science fiction and horror books. A graduate of Stony Brook University, she has spent nearly a decade writing for publications including Thought Catalog, Huffington Post, Teen Vogue, and more. You can find her on Instagram @hollyrio and Twitter @hollyyrio.