Signs He’s Never Going To Propose, So Stop Waiting Around

There’s a category of women who say they’re “waiting.” That means they’re waiting for the day when their boyfriends pop the question. Some of these women imagine the perfect moment for years before realizing this guy has no interest in taking that next step forward. Will he propose? Here are some signs he’s never going to propose so you don’t waste your time if marriage is your end goal.

  1. He’s not anxious to make a timeline. You deserve to be on the same page with your partner when it comes to expectations. Remember, this is the guy you’re imagining the rest of your life with. If you can’t sit down and talk about when marriage and kids may be a possibility, he’s not really excited by the idea of settling down.
  2. When you show him a ring you like, he changes the subject. This is one of the most obvious and cringeworthy signs he’s never going to propose. The ring is a gift from him to you, but it’s nice if he knows your preferences. After all, you’re expected to wear it for the rest of your life. If he tenses up when you show him rings or brushes you off completely, it’s literally the last topic on his mind.
  3. If he says he’s not a commitment sort of guy, believe him. As much as you want to change him, you can’t. And you shouldn’t. You might be the best girlfriend in the whole world, but if he’s openly against marriage, you won’t change his mind. Even if he manages to elope just for you, he’ll make a lousy husband since it’s a job title he never wanted. Respect his views, and the two of you will both be a lot happier.
  4. If he’s past the timeline, it’s off his radar completely. Say you made a timeline years ago. He said he’d propose by the end of last year. Well, now it’s the new year and you’re still waiting for the day. Guys who want to get married want to make this moment special for you. They also want to show you they’re dependable. If he forgot about the date that he set himself, just cut him loose. Otherwise, you’ll be waiting pretty much forever.
  5. He hasn’t mentioned the topic and you’ve been together for more than five years. Some couples never get married, and that’s just fine. Each situation is different. But if he’s never even brought up the topic with you and you’re past the half-decade mark, don’t expect him to suddenly pull off a big surprise.
  6. He keeps telling you that “the more you ask, the more I don’t want to propose.” This is a huge excuse and a major sign he’s never going to propose. He’s trying to put the blame onto you as to why he hasn’t asked you to marry him yet. The truth is, he has no intention of doing it. In fact, he probably hopes you’ll just forget about it completely.
  7. He’s against women asking men. Even though it’s traditionally the man who asks the woman, times are changing. Your guy just isn’t here for it because it gives you too much power. If you ask him to marry you and he says no, he knows the relationship as it is today will be ruined.
  8. He’s told you he’s “still thinking of a good idea,” but he’s used that line for about two years. Yes, a proposal should be special, but at the end of the day, it’s just asking whether or not there’s a permanent future ahead. You don’t need a photographer, or a big party, or even a promise ring if it’s something he’s still saving up for. If he keeps stalling since he thinks his proposal isn’t good enough, he’s not seeing the big picture and wasting your time.
  9. When a family member asks him about it, he gets mad. His family probably wants him to settle down, and if he’s been with you for some time, they’d likely be psyched about a commitment. But if they ask him and his response is anger, that means he’s upset they brought it up. Eventually, they’ll learn not to talk about it anymore, and the entire idea of marriage will fade away.
  10. Dates aren’t as common. If you’ve been together for a while, he’ll know you’ll have expectations if he suddenly plans a fancy dinner out. So, he may stop that entirely. If you notice more Whopper Jrs for dinner, he’s toning down dates. This is so that you don’t call him out on his lack of proposal. Pretty soon, he’s hoping this will become the norm. If you do go out somewhere nice, he may stress beforehand that this is “just a dinner for your birthday” to try and make sure you know to expect nothing else. Stop wasting your time and move on.
Karen Belz is a New Jersey native who is currently living in Maryland. She has a Bachelor’s Degree in Speech Communication with a focus in Broadcasting and Print Media Studies from Millersville University of Pennsylvania. Since graduating, she has written for sites like LittleThings, HelloGiggles, and Scary Mommy and is currently an e-commerce editor at Bustle.

When she's not writing, she enjoys making her phone run out of memory after taking too many photos of her dog. You can find her on Twitter @karenebelz or on Instagram @karenbelz.