13 Signs Someone Is Truly Confident And Not Just Faking It

Confidence isn’t about never feeling doubt; it’s about not being ruled by it. The truly confident move through the world with a sense of self-assuredness that is as much about their demeanor as it is about their interaction with the world around them and the people in it. Here’s how you know someone has confidence in spades.

1. They admit when they don’t know something.

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A confident person doesn’t bluff their way through situations. They have a secure sense of self that makes it easy for them to admit when they don’t know much about a particular topic. This honesty isn’t seen as a vulnerability but as an opportunity to learn and grow. They do not feel embarrassed by not knowing—instead, they ask questions and show a readiness to understand, which, in turn, often earns them more respect.

2. They listen more than they speak.

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Confident people practice active listening. They’re not preoccupied with what they want to say while the other person is talking; they’re fully in the moment, digesting what’s being said. This trait displays a level of self-assurance that doesn’t need to be asserted by the sound of their own voice. Their tendency to listen more than they talk is a sign of a person who values connection and understanding over merely being heard.

3. They celebrate other people’s success.

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People who are secure in themselves don’t get jealous of other people’s successes — they feel inspired by them. They understand that supporting other people and sharing in their joy doesn’t take away from their own accomplishments. This ability to genuinely rejoice in someone else’s happiness and victories displays a self-confidence that’s not reliant on comparisons or competition but that’s rooted in a solid grasp on their self-worth.

4. They stick to their values.

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A confident person knows their principles and sticks to them, even when pressured to do otherwise. Being so steadfast isn’t about inflexibility; it’s about having a clear understanding of right and wrong. Their values guide their actions and decisions, simple as that. They don’t look to everyone else for cues on how to behave; they act according to their own ethical code, which provides a reliable, consistent foundation for their life decisions. (By the way, if you want to find more people with qualities on this list in your dating life, check out our sister site, Sweetn. They have tips, tricks, and advice that will completely change your love life in just a few weeks.)

5. They ask for help.

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Self-assured people recognize that no one is an island. They understand that asking for help isn’t a weakness — it’s an important aspect of human connection and growth. They approach people with humility and respect when they need something, fully aware that the act of asking for help is a shared opportunity for learning and collaboration. When they do get assistance from someone, they’re always sure to show gratitude, as well.

6. They don’t brag.

True confidence is quiet — it doesn’t feel the need to proclaim its presence. Truly confident people are comfortable letting their accomplishments speak for themselves. They don’t need affirmation from other people to feel validated. When they achieve something, they might share their success as a way to motivate other people, but never in a way that feels like bragging.

7. They speak with certainty.

Portrait of a casual student outdoors.

When confident people talk, they’re clear and self-assured. They have a way of conveying their thoughts and ideas without hesitation. This doesn’t mean they’re always right, but they talk in a way that shows they believe in what they’re saying. It’s this level of conviction that often inspires trust and respect from other people. They’re never uncertain because they’ve taken the time to think things through and they stand behind their words with confidence.

8. They’re decisive and stick to their guns.

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Confidence manifests itself in their ability to make decisions without undue hand-wringing. While confident people take the time to gather facts and consider the possible consequences, they don’t become paralyzed by the fear of making the wrong choice. They trust in their ability to make sound decisions and to deal with the consequences of those decisions if things don’t work out.

9. They accept criticism gracefully.

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The ability to receive feedback without having a knee-jerk, defensive reaction is a classic trait of truly confident people. They understand that constructive criticism is a tool for improvement. These people can listen to critical feedback, filter out any negativity, and extract the valuable insights. They don’t crumble under the weight of criticism; they use it as a stepping stone to become better at what they do.

10. They don’t need constant reassurance.

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People with genuine confidence trust in their judgment and abilities; they don’t seek out affirmation every step of the way. Their self-assurance is rooted in a history of personal successes and failures, both of which have contributed to a stable self-esteem that doesn’t waver with the ups and downs of life. They appreciate feedback and recognition like anyone else, but their sense of self-worth doesn’t depend on it.

11. They’re comfortable with being alone.

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Confident people enjoy their own company and don’t require constant social interaction to feel happy and fulfilled. They use solitude as an opportunity for introspection, creativity, and rest. They’re not isolating themselves, they’re just at peace without distractions. It’s this internal comfort that enables them to be more present when they do socialize.

12. They adapt to change rather than fighting it.

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Change can be daunting, but confident people face it head-on. They’re flexible in their approaches and can pivot easily when life throws a curveball. Their confidence comes from a deep-seated belief in their ability to handle new challenges and from an understanding that change is often a door to new opportunities. This adaptability is crucial and is a clear sign of a person who is not just surviving but thriving, regardless of circumstances.

13. They set healthy personal boundaries.

Confident people understand the importance of personal boundaries in maintaining self-respect and mutual respect in relationships. They’re clear on what they will and won’t tolerate and they communicate these boundaries assertively, without aggression or passivity. They have a strong sense of self-worth and know that without boundaries, they’ll never be healthy or happy.

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Gail is Bolde's social media and partnership manager, as well as an all-around behind-the-scenes renaissance woman. She worked for more than 25 years in her city's local government before making the switch to women's lifestyle and relationship sites, initially at HelloGiggles before making the switch to Bolde.
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