Cheating comes in many forms, and there’s no bigger betrayal than finding out your partner is having a long-term emotional or physical affair. Think he might be cheating? Here’s what to look out for.
He’s texting a lot more than normal. If your guy doesn’t text all that often but suddenly it’s ramping up, you have a reason to be a little suspicious. That typically means there’s someone new in his life he’s getting to know. It could be a completely innocent relationship, but if he’s actively ignoring you for his phone, there’s a better chance he met someone new.
He’s also hiding his computer tabs. Nothing raises suspicion like suddenly closing a bunch of tabs the second you walk in the room. That means he could be placing some Craigslist ads or maybe just looking around on a dating app that you assumed was no longer active.
He’s actually a little more attentive than normal. It’s great to have a partner who cares, but if he cares a little more than his standard amount, it could be the guilt setting in. That, or he’s afraid his cover may be busted and wants to really fill the role of “best boyfriend ever” to throw you off in case someone clues you into an affair.
When things are bad, he threatens to walk away. Honestly, he’s hoping you’ll take the bait. That way, if you find out about another woman later on, he can use the “things were rocky” card. That, or he can fudge details and pretend he met someone else shortly after the split.
He suddenly gets a brand new look. It’s OK for people to experiment, but if your guy is pretty standard with his everyday appearance, a new look may be a big sign that he’s out impressing someone new, especially if it’s a look you aren’t too fond of. Much like women often get haircuts after a relationship is over to move forward, men can also change their appearance to represent a new stage.
He’s working later hours. He says there’s a big project ahead but that project never seems to have an end-date. His office is likely his safe zone. He knows you’re not going to swing on by, especially if he has a hefty commute. Who knows what may be going on in there?
His future plans have changed overnight. The two of you used to talk about having kids someday but suddenly, he’s dashed that idea and doesn’t even know if he wants a wedding. These are huge life decisions that typically don’t change that quickly unless something is going on.
He’s suddenly a little shady with money. If the two of you share any sort of accounts, you might question some changes on your credit card statement, especially charges to locations he typically doesn’t shop at. He might ease your mind in order to make sure you don’t call them in as fraudulent, but he’ll probably tell you “it’s nothing” or “it’s for a work thing.”
He’s booking friend vacations and not inviting you. Every guy needs some time with his friends, but going out together most weekends and not inviting you just seems shady. It’s possible these are “anything goes” trips, offering him the perfect opportunity to be unfaithful.
He has a brand new hobby. It’s admirable if he wants to get a check on his health. But if he’s suddenly booking cycling classes three times a week, it could also be based on something he’s spotted in class. This is a really sneaky way to make a connection. If you’re married, he can also easily leave his ring in his gym locker to make himself appear single.
He’s started comparing you to other women in his life. It could even be his mom. By hearing “so-and-so would never treat me this way,” he’s trying to guilt you into thinking you’re not a great partner and he deserves better. Later down the road, this will be his “initiative” to cheat. Don’t buy into it.
He’s forgetting major anniversaries and events. It seems like his mind is somewhere else these days, and that could be because he’s balancing two relationships at once. If he seems more scatterbrained than normal, there’s a good chance he might be using his mental resources on keeping up with, or planning, an affair. You deserve someone who gives you their full attention and won’t leave you guessing as to whether or not you’re the only one in his life.
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