18 Things That Trigger A Narcissist’s Jealousy (And How They Lash Out)

18 Things That Trigger A Narcissist’s Jealousy (And How They Lash Out)

Everyone knows that one person who gets weirdly moody when they’re not the center of attention. But with narcissists, their fragile egos and need for constant admiration turn that basic jealousy into a whole other beast. Here’s what sets them off, and the not-so-pretty ways they might react.

1. You’re getting attention and they’re not.

Someone compliments your outfit? Your work gets praised? Suddenly, the narcissist is sulking or picking a fight. They can’t stand not being the center of attention. They might make snide remarks about the person who complimented you or try to one-up you with their own bragging.

You may also like: People Who Had Unhappy Childhoods Usually Develop These Traits

2. You have strong friendships or a supportive family.

Narcissists want to isolate you, so they can control you. They view your healthy support systems as a threat to their power and may engage in manipulative behaviors to undermine those bonds. As PsychCentral explains, narcissists may use tactics like criticism, creating conflict, and portraying themselves as the victim to drive a wedge between you and your loved ones.

Enjoy this piece? Give it a like and follow Bolde on MSN for more!

3. You’re succeeding at anything, even just a hobby.

Their inflated ego can’t handle you shining in any way. They’ll either belittle your accomplishments or try to leech onto them for attention. Don’t be surprised if they suddenly develop an interest in your hobby, only to abandon it once the initial buzz fades.

You may also like: How A Narcissist Acts When You Start Seeing Through Their BS

4. You dare to have boundaries.

Saying “no” to their demands or needing some space? Get ready for the guilt trips, manipulation, and even accusations designed to make you back down. They might play the victim, claiming you don’t care about their needs, or act like they’re doing you a huge favor by even talking to you.

Enjoy this piece? Give it a like and follow Bolde on MSN for more!

5. You’re genuinely happy.

Narcissists thrive on drama and negativity. Your inner peace throws them off balance because it’s something they can’t fake or control. They’ll nitpick your reasons for being happy or subtly try to undermine your confidence, all in an attempt to drag you down to their level.

You may also like: 15 Things To Keep To Yourself Because They’re Nobody’s Business But Yours

6. You express an opinion that differs from theirs.

Their fragile worldview requires everyone to agree with them. Even reasoned disagreement will be met with defensiveness or rage. They’ll twist your words, accuse you of being “difficult,” or outright gaslight you, trying to make you doubt your own perceptions.

Enjoy this piece? Give it a like and follow Bolde on MSN for more!

7. You get a better offer (job promotion, a nice gift, etc.).

Anything that makes you look good by comparison makes a narcissist see red. Expect them to either downplay your achievement or play the victim, Psychology Today warns. They could claim that similar opportunities were denied to them due to unfairness, or try to guilt-trip you by talking about their own struggles.

You may also like: How A Narcissist Acts When They Can’t Fool You Anymore

8. You’re better at something than they are, or they think you are.

Their superiority complex is a house of cards. Even the slightest hint that you might outshine them triggers a meltdown. They might try to sabotage your efforts, spread rumors to diminish your success, or suddenly become overly critical of your work.

Enjoy this piece? Give it a like and follow Bolde on MSN for more!

9. Someone else calls them out on their BS.

Narcissists hate being exposed. They’ll lash out at you for not defending them, and double down on their behavior towards the person who confronted them. Don’t expect an apology; instead, they’ll likely paint themselves as the victim or accuse the other person of being overly sensitive.

You may also like: 16 Signs You Didn’t Get Enough Affection As A Child

10. They suspect you might be jealous because that’s how they’d feel.

Narcissists project their own insecurities rather than owning them. They’ll accuse you of envy to distract from their jealousy, or just to cause drama. They might try to provoke you by flirting with others or bragging about their exes, waiting for you to react.

Enjoy this piece? Give it a like and follow Bolde on MSN for more!

11. You’re handling a tough situation with grace.

They can’t deal with the idea that you’re strong and resourceful. They’ll either nitpick your choices or try to swoop in as the “hero.” Expect unsolicited advice, attempts to take over, or backhanded compliments about how “lucky” you are that they’re there to help.

You may also like: 18 Personality Traits Of An Unhappily Married Man

12. Someone finds them boring or unattractive.

soft ghostingiStock/LeoPatrizi

This is a direct hit to their self-image. They might obsessively try to win that person over, or rage about how “stupid” that person is. They’ll either act overly charming to prove their desirability or go on the defensive, attacking the other person’s appearance or personality.

Enjoy this piece? Give it a like and follow Bolde on MSN for more!

13. You spend time on literally anything besides them.

Hobbies, work, even sleep… it’s all a threat. They demand your constant focus, regardless of whether it’s healthy or sustainable. Be prepared for sulking, accusations of not loving them, or attempts to guilt you into abandoning your own interests.

You may also like: Don’t Share These 15 Things With Anyone – They’re Nobody’s Business But Yours

14. You’re just having a good day and they’re not.

Fitness woman exercising outdoors

Your good mood exposes their inner misery. They’ll find a way to ruin it, or withdraw in a sulk until you feel bad too. They might pick a fight over something trivial or try to drag you into talking about their problems.

Enjoy this piece? Give it a like and follow Bolde on MSN for more!

15. Your pet gets more attention than they do.

Yep, they can be even jealous of animals. Anything that takes your focus from them is a potential rival, even a fluffy, unconditionally loving one. They might make snide remarks about your pet, demand you get rid of it, or compete with it for your affection.

You may also like: Things Narcissists Say To Shut You Down When You Confront Them

16. They sense you might be onto their manipulation tactics.

As you get wise to their games, they get desperate. Expect smear campaigns, playing the victim, or sudden attempts to love-bomb you. They’ll try to isolate you even further, hoping to make you question your own judgment and regain control.

Enjoy this piece? Give it a like and follow Bolde on MSN for more!

17. You’re figuring out how to break free of them.

They know, deep down, you deserve better. When they sense you’re pulling away, their behavior may escalate in an attempt to keep you trapped. Prepare for increased emotional blackmail, threats, or promises of change that never materialize.

You may also like: 15 Types Of People You Should Never Trust In Life

18. You’re living your best life without them in the picture.

This is a narcissist’s ultimate nightmare. Your happiness, free from their toxic influence, is the best revenge (and the best protection!). While they might try to hoover you back in, or badmouth you to others, their power over you is gone.

Enjoy this piece? Give it a like and follow Bolde on MSN for more!

Originally from Australia, Emma Mills graduated from the University of Queensland with a dual degree in Philosophy and Applied Linguistics before moving to Los Angeles to become a professional matchmaker (a bit of a shift, obviously). Since 2015, she has helped more than 150 people find lasting love and remains passionate about bringing amazing singletons together.

Emma is also the author of the upcoming Hachette publication, "Off the Beaten Track: Finding Lasting Love in the Least Likely of Places," due out in January 2025.
close-link
close-link
close-link
close-link