Being alone is awesome, but it might not feel that way. You might struggle when your friends aren’t around or your partner’s away for the weekend. Maybe you fear being on your own because you’re afraid to be alone with your thoughts or you don’t know what to do with yourself if someone’s not around to entertain you. Does that sound like you? Here are 15 signs that you’re afraid of being alone.
1. You keep friends talking on the phone.
If you’re facing a night of takeaway food and TV time for one, you might feel anxious. To deal with that discomfort, you might call up a friend you haven’t spoken to in a while and talk their ear off for hours to help you pass the time.
2. You refuse to break up with your toxic partner.
You might stay in unhealthy relationships because you don’t want to be on your own. You’re sacrificing your happiness because you’d rather have someone around than be single. But at what cost?
3. You plan your weekends days ahead of time.
You feel antsy when the weekend approaches and you don’t have solid plans in place. To combat this, you’ll start planning for weekends at the start of the work week so you can ensure you get out of the house.
4. You text people you don’t really like sometimes.
When you’re alone and your closest friends are busy, you might reach for your phone and text someone you don’t really like. This is to give you something to do so you don’t sit around and feel lonely, but it usually leads to disappointment.
5. You’re chatty with everyone you meet.
You’re the type of person who’ll strike up a conversation with everyone you meet, from the Amazon delivery person to the doorman of your building. You might even invite people you’ve met in the world out with you and your friends so you can increase your social circle. It reduces the risk of being alone.
6. You’re always keen to help others.
When your friend needs help buying a new car or moving out of their apartment, you’re always quick to suggest helping them out. Although you want to support your friends, you also try to be generous so you can ensure you fill up your spare time.
7. You don’t go see a movie you’re dying to watch if you have to go alone.
You refuse to head out and watch a movie alone — the mere thought makes you break out in a sweat. You always try to get friends to go out with you so you don’t have to go by yourself. Ditto for eating alone at a restaurant.
8. You’re a relationship bouncer.
You can’t handle being single. Maybe you can’t even remember when last you were without a romantic partner because you jump from one relationship to the next so you don’t have to find out what it’s like to spend time alone.
9. You’re a stage-five clinger.
You’re so afraid of being alone that you’ll cling to partners. The thought of them leaving you freaks you out so much. These thoughts and feelings are risky, though, because they could cause you to stay with people who don’t treat you right just so you have a warm body in the bed next to you.
10. You go the extra mile for people to like you.
To ensure you always have people around, you put in loads of work with friends or partners to show them that you care. The danger of this is that you can be taken advantage of, or you’ll depend too much on other people for their approval and expect them to meet your needs.
11. You bite your tongue to avoid conflict.
Whether in friendships or relationships, you always try to keep the peace. Even if someone has hurt you, you’d rather let it go and forget about it instead of confronting them. You’re afraid that if you fight, they could leave you.
12. When you have time alone, you feel bored.
If you have to spend a Sunday afternoon alone, you don’t know what to do with yourself. You might feel bored or pace around your apartment, feeling impatient for your next social event so you don’t have to stare at the wall. This could be because you’re not using your time alone to its highest potential.
13. You’re afraid of being judged if you’re out in public alone.
Whenever you leave your apartment to head into the city by yourself, you always feel weird. You might fear that people are judging you when they see you without someone to keep you company. You’re quite self-conscious about it and avoid being alone out there as much as you can.
14. Your friends joke that you know everyone.
When you and your friends are hanging out in public, they’ll laugh at how everyone seems to know you. This isn’t something that just happened. You go out of your way to make connections and build friendships. You’d rather have 100 friends you don’t know that well than three close friends who are never around.
15. You settle into romantic relationships.
To avoid being alone, you’ll settle for less than you want or deserve. You’d rather be in a relationship that doesn’t tick all of your boxes instead of sitting alone on a Saturday night. But, here’s the thing: you’d be able to make yourself much happier on your own if you gave it a shot!
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