Is it our charm? Our wit? Our natural beauty? We ladies have always wondered what it is about us that guys find so attractive. This Reddit thread asked a bunch of straight dudes to reveal all—and this is what they said.
A good sense of humor “I don’t even care if she can make the jokes, I just want someone who can appreciate them,” one respondent said. Basically, you don’t have to be a full-on comedian in your relationship but you should feel comfortable enough making corny jokes and not take things too seriously.
An ability to live life offline “Not posting on social media. I find that girls who ghost their social media accounts tend to be genuinely interesting people with adventurous lives,” said another guy. This was a common answer on the thread, with one guy even going so far to say that it comes across as insecure if you’re constantly on social media. The verdict? Put down your phone and focus on living your best life and the guys will undoubtedly love you for it.
A laid-back personality “If she’s laid back and funny, there’s nothing sexier.” Another popular answer, it seems that guys don’t appreciate it when you act like Monica from Friends during one of her cleaning frenzies. Sure, everyone has deal breakers and boundaries and those are important, but you need to be able to relax and go with the flow sometimes.
Being a good conversationalist “If she can maintain a conversation about a topic that she has some amount of passion for, [that’s hot]. Also, she has to be outgoing enough to initiate conversation with me while also being subtle enough to not scare me away.” It seems to be a bit of a fine line to me, but if you can make a guy feel comfortable when he’s talking to you without coming across as intimidating, then you’re golden. (And frankly, if he does get intimidated by you, he’s probably not worth your time.)
Modesty “If she’s really beautiful but doesn’t take herself too seriously. There are few things more off-putting than a woman who conducts herself in such a way that makes it obvious that she knows she’s turning heads and that she’s come to expect it. But when a woman is attractive and she just wants to be herself irrespective of what everyone around her thinks, that’s appealing. And rare.” If you want to please these types of guys who love a modest woman, maybe it’s time for fewer selfies in the streets and more make-up free outings. Just saying.
Quietness “I like quiet girls. The girl not dancing around talking to everyone will get more attention from me.” Hurrah for introverts everywhere. A lot of guys would rather you be yourself than try to be something you’re not. Shy ladies, take note. This is not to say that you should change yourself if you’re naturally loud, of course. Just be you!
Nerdiness “[She] has got to be a nerd. I don’t really care about what, but something. Movies, science, a show, video games (ENORMOUS PLUS), [she] just has to be able to geek out about stuff.” We’re all a little bit nerdy about something, so let your inner dork shine on your dates and you’re sure to win his affection.
Independence “I like an independent girl. Someone who not only is sure of herself but can hold a conversation, has interests unrelated to a relationship, and generally is someone who can have a life outside of whatever I bring to the table.” Another common specification, guys like it when we have our own lives. We don’t need them but we want them—and they find this super inviting.
Taking initiative “A girl that takes the initiative. This can apply to a wide variety of scenarios, from just going up talking to the guy you’re interested in (don’t worry about the fear of rejection—I’ve seen more guys afraid of that, than anything else) to having a concern or an issue about something (DO NOT remain silent about an issue or concern, [I] can’t stress that enough), this makes a girl stand out in a more meaningful way.” You heard it here first, ladies.
Confidence in herself “Her being comfortable being herself [and] expressing her feelings.” To slightly contradict others in the thread, some guys like the confident approach. Not only do they appreciate a sense of ease with yourself, but they like you to have good communication skills when it comes to what you’re thinking and feeling. Say it with me: openness is key.
Having passions “Just having [an] interesting hobby. It is awesome to see someone have a passion in their life. Super bonus points if you share an interest with the dude.” Essentially, guys think it’s important for us to have our own interests outside of the relationship but things in common inside of the relationship too. That’s what they call a win-win scenario.
Cute mannerisms “The way she walks, the way she talks, the way she expresses herself, etc. Little things like that.” Because we’re unable to control how we behave and act due to the fact that it’s been ingrained in us since we were small children, it’s fair to say that some guys just find us attractive for just being ourselves. That’s quite nice to know, isn’t it?
Being an overall “good girl” “If she is a kind, thoughtful, caring and supportive person [then she’s attractive]. A good girl, aka a scarce commodity.” Just like us, a lot of guys aren’t going to appreciate the “bad” eggs. You know, the “treat ‘em mean to keep ‘em keen” type. The players and the rebels. Bear this in mind the next time you’re calling your date a name for no reason.
A nice voice “IMO, one of the most attractive parts of a woman is her voice,” said one particular Reddit poster. “Not just the ability to speak in complete sentences (which should be more common) but the sound of her voice. I went out with this girl for a minute who was a complete idiot, but she had this husky, raspy, (dare I say it) melodious voice—and I’m pretty sure that I spent more time talking to her on the phone than I did in person because her voice was just so pleasant to listen to.” Ladies, perhaps it’s time to get your rasp on? IDK. Regardless of what you think about this, the important thing to take away is that every guy is different—and every woman is hot in her own unique way.
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