14 Ways Your Gut’s Trying To Warn You He’s Bad News

Sometimes you just get a funny feeling about someone that you can’t really explain. Don’t ignore it—it’s probably your intuition at work! If you’re dating a guy and something just feels off, that’s your gut trying to warn you that something’s not quite right. Here are some signs he’s bad news that you really shouldn’t ignore.

  1. When he leaves, he takes your energy with him. After dates, you feel really drained emotionally, mentally, or physically (or all three). It’s a sign that he’s not lifting you up but bringing you down with his baggage or drama. This is one of the biggest signs he’s bad news.
  2. Instead of excitement when you’re with him, you often feel discomfort or dread. You might not get butterflies every time you have to see him which is perfectly fine (especially after the first few months), but if you’re not really excited about your dates, it could be because he’s not the right guy for you.
  3. Your heart rate increases when you have to confront him. When you ask him about why he doesn’t speak to his family or what his ex was like, you get really nervous. WTF? It’s like you can sense that something’s up. It might even be that he’s not open with you or gets defensive when you ask him personal questions—both of those things are huge red flags.
  4. You’re stressing out way more than usual. You’re not usually jealous, nor do you overanalyze and worry that the guy you’re dating is going to hurt you but with this guy, you just can’t help it. Even if you don’t know what’s up, the fact that you’re constantly thinking that something is means you’re probably right.
  5. You’re dreaming of leaving him. You used to think he was the man of your dreams, but now you realize he’s more like a subconscious nightmare. Whether the dreams occur when you’re awake or sleeping, they could be your subconscious trying to communicate with you. Maybe deep down you know you’d be happier without him.
  6. You’re literally getting sick more often than normal. Sometimes your intuition communicates through your body by giving you physical symptoms. For instance, if your stomach’s always in knots around this guy or you’re constantly feeling under the weather, your body’s showing you that he’s not right for you. He’s giving you anxiety instead of peace, and that’s not a good thing.
  7. You can’t put your finger on what’s wrong but you know there’s something. You know when you’re on a date with a great guy but you can’t help but feel there’s something shady or weird about him even though you can’t put your finger on it? There’s a scientific explanation for it. Your dopamine neurons enable you to feel things that are going to happen, giving you signs when patterns are being created that you might not realize on a conscious level. The dopamine gets pumped out by your brain in strange situations, creating that “off” or “weird” feeling. It’s happening for a reason! Pay attention to it.
  8. You can’t chill around him. If you’re regularly jittery or restless around the guy, and it’s not because you had three coffees—your body’s trying to tell you something. Maybe you just don’t feel like you can let your guard down around him or he makes you feel bored instead of relaxed. You should feel comfortable with your partner and if you don’t, that’s a big problem.
  9. Something about his stories just doesn’t add up. It’s natural to want to learn more about the guy you’re newly dating, but if you’re often pushed to ask him more questions about a subject you’ve already covered, maybe you just don’t trust him or his stories. That curiosity could be leading you to discover a greater truth.
  10. You don’t miss him when you’re apart. It’s healthy to do your own thing and enjoy your life when you’re not with the guy, but if you have much more fun when he’s not in the picture, that’s a huge sign he might not be bad news but that he’s not right for you. Your intuition in this case is the great feeling you get when you’re flying solo.
  11. You panic when he calls. Sure, it’s normal to experience butterflies or nerves when he calls, but if you’re panicked about it, that’s not healthy. It could be that you’re dreading talking to him, like if he’s always calling you with some or other drama in his life. Ugh. This is one of the signs his presence is bad news in your life.
  12. You’re having off-the-wall thoughts. You sense doom and gloom no matter how nuts your BFF says you are. The thoughts you’re having, like that he’s cheating on you with your sister or will leave you stranded on holiday, seem bonkers AF but they won’t go away. Listen to them. They’re jumping through hoops to get your attention.
  13. You’re out of sync. Ever had one of those relationships where everything goes wrong? You get food poisoning during a night out then lose your phone so you can’t contact your BF. Pretty much whenever you want to spend real time with him something comes up. Drama, drama, drama! If you spot a negative or stressful pattern happening, maybe your intuition is alerting you to these problems because it’s really trying to show you that something’s just not working in your relationship. They’re not necessarily signs from the universe, but if there’s an obstacle at every turn, you have to ask yourself why.
  14. You can’t shake the emptiness. No matter how great your relationship seems from the outside, you can’t shake that feeling of doubt or emptiness in your belly. It’s your intuition trying to tell you that things aren’t as good as you think, but they might not have anything to do with the guy you’re dating. Maybe it’s just that you’re not happy in spite of all the great things in your relationship. It’s not normal to feel that emptiness or doubt every day, so if it persists, it’s definitely worth listening to.
Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.