Self-love isn’t just about massages and face masks—though they are lovely—it’s about showing up for yourself every day, even in the simplest ways. If you’ve been feeling off lately or a little empty inside, it might be because you’re making yourself the last priority. Life is hectic in the 21st century, so you need to devote time to yourself and give “you” the love and care you deserve. These small, often unnoticed habits prove you’re not practicing enough self-love and need to step up your gain.
1. Not Having a Daily Skincare Routine
Your skin is the largest organ in your body, and it deserves your love and attention. To ward off premature aging, apply sunscreen daily regardless of the weather—you can burn through a window. You also need to implement a daily skincare routine to keep your skin hydrated, smooth, and radiant. At a minimum, you need to cleanse, apply moisturizer, and exfoliate 2-3 times a week to remove dead skin cells. Look to products that have skin-saving antioxidant ingredients like ceramides, hyaluronic acid, vitamin C, and niacinamide.
2. Dissing Your Appearance
Self-love means exactly that: loving yourself. If you spend more time criticizing yourself in the mirror than appreciating what you like about yourself, stop now. Constantly focusing on your flaws or being down on your appearance or personality only reinforces the idea that you’re not enough. Instead, practice self-love by acknowledging or writing down what you love about yourself—whether it’s your sense of humor, strength, or the color of your eyes—you know you have them.
3. Not Scheduling Self-Care Rituals
Going for a spa day is the ultimate in self-care, but you can also do little things every day to keep yourself grounded, balanced, and happy. Easy self-care rituals include journaling, meditating, or even taking time to unwind with a good book or go for a walk. Whatever your pleasure, make yourself a priority. Run a bath tonight and have a good night’s sleep. That is self-care right there.
4. Overscheduling Everything Else
If your calendar is filled with commitments that leave you no time to breathe, you’ve overscheduled and robbed yourself of downtime. Overbooking your life is a form of self-neglect—when was the last time you relaxed without feeling guilty? Self-love is about knowing when to say no, setting boundaries, and creating space for yourself.
5. Prioritizing the Wrong People
Being a people-pleaser isn’t noble, but it’s a surefire way to run yourself into the ground. You sell yourself short when you never make time for yourself and constantly put everyone else’s needs before your own. It’s not selfish to prioritize yourself; it’s crucial for your mental and physical health. The more you keep sidelining your happiness, the faster you’ll burn out.
6. Apologizing for Nothing
When you apologize for existing, taking up space, or having feelings, it’s a sign that you don’t think you’re worthy. Saying sorry when you don’t need to apologize chips away at your confidence and reinforces the belief that you’re somehow “too much” or “not enough.” Live your life on your terms and unapologetically.
7. Eating the Wrong Foods
Neglecting your physical health means you’re not practicing self-love. Skipping meals, not drinking enough water, or staying up all night binge-watching Netflix is taking its toll. Treating your body like an afterthought sends the message that you don’t think it’s worth caring for. Self-love means fueling it with good, nutritious food. Eat a well-balanced antioxidant-rich diet packed with fruit, green leafy vegetables, fatty Omega-3-filled fish like salmon and mackerel, and learn portions.
8. Tolerating Toxic Behavior
When you keep people in your life who drain you, mistreat you, or don’t add value, it’s a red flag that you don’t love yourself enough to set boundaries. Clinging to toxic relationships and people is like inviting poison into your home and then wondering why you feel sick all the time. Loving yourself means cutting ties with anyone who brings you down or doesn’t support or respect you—no exceptions.
9. Downplaying Your Achievements
You matter, so stop brushing off your accomplishments like they’re no big deal. When you don’t take the time to celebrate your wins and accomplishments, you’re telling yourself that nothing you do is ever good enough. Self-love means recognizing your talents and appreciating your efforts. You deserve to bask in the glow of your achievements, so don’t dismiss them; praise them. Stop being so modest—you’ve earned the praise.
10. Not Advocating For Yourself
Whether it’s at work, in your relationships, or with friends, biting your tongue instead of speaking up for yourself is a sign you don’t think your opinion or you matter. Self-love means advocating for your needs and expressing your opinion without apologies. If you won’t stand up for yourself, who will? Speak your truth and make your voice heard—it’s the ultimate act of self-respect. And people will respect you more
11. Not Tuning in to Your Mental Health
Your mental health is just as important as your physical health. Being busy or stressed out isn’t a status symbol; it’s a sign that you prioritize productivity over well-being. Self-love is about listening to your body and knowing when to slow down, rest, and recharge. You’re not doing yourself any favors by running yourself into the ground, which can lead to anxiety, depression, and burnout.
12. Telling Yourself Your Dreams Are Unrealistic
People who achieved their dreams went after them. If you’ve stopped dreaming, you’ve stopped believing. When you settle for good enough or tell yourself that your goals are “unrealistic,” you’re sabotaging your happiness and potential. Self-love means daring to dream big and pursuing your passions, no matter how lofty. Stop holding yourself back, that only leads to regret.
13. Feeling Envious of Fake Lives on Social Media
If you scroll through social media and fall victim to comparing someone’s fake curated life to yours, you’re setting yourself up for misery. When you compare yourself to others, you tell yourself that what you have—or who you are—will never be good enough. Self-love is about embracing your journey, owning your choices, and being grateful for what you have. Start seeing the beauty in your own life.
14. Beating Yourself Up
When you constantly replay your mistakes in your head and beat yourself up over them, you’re your own worst enemy. Everyone makes mistakes—called being human and how we learn and grow. Self-love means forgiving yourself and moving on. Stop holding yourself to an impossible standard and just enjoy the ride.
15. Silencing Your Inner Voice
If you’re always second-guessing or ignoring that gut feeling, you don’t trust yourself. Your intuition is your inner guide, and it’s there to tell you what’s right for you. Let it guide the way. Self-love is about tuning into your inner voice and trusting that you know what’s best for you. If not, you can go through life on autopilot, follow the crowd, and make the wrong decisions. Quit the job you hate, end a relationship that doesn’t fulfill you, and shake up your routine to feel more alive and inspired.
